Becoming Accustomed to Family
by lelalemon
Summary: Spencer is attempting to fit in with Aaron and Jack after Haley leaves while Aaron is attempting to define and contain his ideals for 'family' and Jack is trying to bring his old family back together while simultaneously accept the changes he cannot control. Hotch/Reid. Domestic abuse and rape. This is a very dark story. There is fluff near the end, but until then gruesome until.
1. Spencer's Tumble

Disclaimer: Do not own anything relating to Criminal Minds. Story loosely based on and entirely inspired by "Window Seat" by SugaKane01.

* * *

"Jack, go to your room," Spencer says. He's trying not to raise his voice.

"You can't make me. You're not my daddy. You're my daddy's _boy toy_," Jack taunts. Spencer is somewhat hurt.

"Jack, I'm your father's partner. I'm not a toy. I'm a person. An Adult person and I said you need to go to your room."

Jack shakes his head and plops down where he was once standing. Spencer bites his lip. The young boy had taken one of Spencer's most treasured items- an original writing from Charles Dodgson on mathematics. He'd kept it locked away in his personal box and both he and Aaron had told the child to leave it be.

But today, to act out or exact revenge, Spencer wasn't sure; the boy had unlocked it with his father's key and ruined it. Spencer had wanted to cry, but not in front of Jack. That was why he needed the boy to go to his room.

"Jack, get up right now and go," Spencer says, not knowing how much longer he can hold on.

Jack gets up and stomps to his room. "I'm telling my mommy that you're trying to take her place!" He shouts before slamming the door.

Spencer puts the ripped, colored-on piece of writing back in the safe he'd kept it in. He picks up all of Jack's crayons and markers while tears slowly slide down his face. He picks up all the toys in the floor and puts them away before sitting on the couch.

It is then that the dam breaks and he begins sobbing. He sucked at being a parent. Aaron was going to be disappointed that the first time he'd left Spencer in charge he'd failed so miserably. That meant the record was one hundred percent failure.

Not only that, but he'd had a one of a kind item. Something that meant the world to him, and though it was still a treasure to him, his step-son had ruined it specifically to hurt him. He hears a noise behind and sees Jack reaching for the safe.

He gets off the couch and tells Jack to go back to the room. Jack grabs the box and turns to run, but Spenser grabs his wrist. "Put it back and don't touch it again!" He finally yells. Jack drops it and runs back to his room.

Spencer picks the box up and hides it under his bed before shuddering. He'd never yelled at Jack before. His clock says that it's five thirty-four. Aaron wouldn't be home for another twenty-six minutes.

* * *

When Aaron comes home the first contact he has is with his crying son. Aaron scoops him up and hugs him.

"Hey buddy, what's wrong?" The boy sniffles. "I wanted to color earlier, but... but daddy Spencer got mad at me for no reason! And he sent me to my room and yelled at me and hurt me," the boy complains.

Aaron is stunned. He knew his lover wasn't very fond of children, but he didn't think he'd go this far.

"How did he hurt you?" He asks. His son snuggles in his arms. "He squeezed my wrist." Aaron grits his teeth and hugs his son.

"I'm going to go talk to him, okay? Can you go wait in the living room?" The boy nods and sits on the couch so he can turn the tv on. Aaron stomps his way to their bedroom. Spencer is lying on the bed, on his back, with the door open. He's spacing off and staring at the ceiling.

"We need to talk," Aaron says. Spencer looks at him and sits up. His eyes are red and puffy, Aaron notes. He wants to be candid with them, but he's genetically more observant of his son's distress. Spencer stands but Aaron pushes him back down onto the bed.

Spencer is surprised. The only time Aaron had ever man-handled him was to save him from danger. "Let me get something straight with you, _genius. _You are not his father. You're not even a step-father. You are just the weak little faggot that his father is fucking!"

Spencer feels shame course through his veins like he wished dilaudid was. And he feels a pain unlike anything he's ever felt. It wasn't that Aaron had called him... One of the most discriminatory names he could think of, nor that he had described their most intimate of moments so ruthlessly... It was that in one sentence he'd excluded him from their family and abnegated any idea that what they had was a relationship.

"You are never allowed to hit or yell at my child! That is what a parent does. You have no rights to punish him."

Spence is in shock. "I sent him to his room..." Spencer says dumbly. He can't believe that Aaron is _this_ upset over something as small as that.

"Jesus Spencer, I know you don't like kids but I thought you'd actually try. You can read twenty-thousand words a minute but you can't handle a seven year old for three hours? I guess it makes sense," Aaron chuckles darkly. "You can't use chopsticks or drive, either. Maybe you just can't do the things normal people are supposed to be able to do. You've never been good at that whole being normal thing," Aaron says.

Spence slaps him and feels tears fall down his face. "You have no right," Spence growls.

"Just like you had no right to _abuse_ my child?" Aaron retorts before tossing Spencer back on the bed. Spencer is frustrated.

"I didn't abuse him! I sent him to his room! I only yelled once!" Spence shouts back at him. "Did he even tell you what he did?"

Aaron thinks about it. He had never mentioned why he was in trouble. Had he even mentioned that he'd been in trouble? Spence reaches under the bed to his lock box. Aaron's stomach falls. Spencer pulls out a piece of haggard looking paper. He shoves it to Aaron's chest and crosses his arms.

Aaron takes the paper and looks it over. It was some sort of writing about math that he was sure he could learn, but at the moment had no experience with. He raises an eyebrow until he sees the signature. Charles Dodgson. Holy Lord. Jack had been told never to get into Spencer's box... And he'd obviously gotten a hold of it.

Aaron looks at his lover's angry face. "I sent him to his room, without yelling, when I found out what he did. I put the paper back in the safe and put it on the table. I picked his toys up and sat on the couch and sobbed," Spencer tells him. "And then he came back and tried to take the safe to his room. I grabbed his wrist when he ran from me with it. I don't know what he was going to do with it. I only yelled once, and it was to get him to drop the box," Spencer explains.

Aaron closes his eyes in shame. "He told me he doesn't have to listen to me because I'm just daddy's boy toy. I guess you agree." Aaron hands the paper back. Spencer wants to be childish and snatch it from his grasp, but that would only hurt him and his already mangled document.

Aaron goes to the door and calls for Jack. The child runs up the stairs and enters the room. "Yes daddy?" He asks sweetly. "Did you get into daddy Spencer's box and rip up his paper?"

The boy glares at Spencer. "I took something special from him because he took something special from me!"

Spencer closes his eyes. Was Jack going to lie and say he stole something from him now? He'd better just start packing, because Aaron would never take his word over Jack's. "What did he take from you?" Aaron asks. Jack points an angry finger at Aaron. "He took you! You're my daddy, and now you spend all your time with him!"

Aaron wraps his arms around Jack. "Sonny, you know I love you," he says. Spencer finishes packing his clothes. He doesn't need much. Aaron looks at him curiously. "I resign as lover and as Agent Reid." He looks at Jack and the boy is smiling at him.

Aaron grabs Spencer into a hug. "I love you and I... I can't let you go Spencer." Spencer is biting his lip. Jack takes this moment to scowl. "I thought you loved me the most!" He shouts.

Aaron sighs. "I love both of you the most. Go to your room, Jack. I need to talk to daddy Spencer." Jack walks out but turns around. "He isn't my daddy," He says before going to his room.

Aaron doesn't release Spencer. "What I said was out of line. It's human nature to just... Believe your kids when they say something. As a father, I want to believe that he would never lie to me, especially about something like this."

Spencer doesn't wrap his arms around Aaron, but he doesn't pull away. "You're admitting that he lied?" Spencer asks. Aaron lets him go and leads them to the bed. "You didn't hit him. And you didn't punish him without reason."

Spencer doesn't sit, but he puts his suitcase down. "When I was a kid, if I had shown such a blatant disregard for someone else or disrespected one of my parents I would have been hit. Not even spanked," he admits. "I would have been beaten. I'm skeptical around kids because I don't want to mess up."

Spencer looks into Aaron's eyes. "I would never purposefully hurt Jack. As you mentioned, I very 'faggotly' consider him my step-son. I would never hurt any child purposefully, but especially him because I love him and I love you, even if those feelings are not returned."

Aaron winces at Spencer's recap of his words. Aaron looks down in shame.

"I don't know if I should stay," Spencer tells him. "It's only a matter of time before he accuses me of something worse. Of beating him, or stealing from him, or God help me, molesting him."

Aaron looks at him. "I wouldn't believe that."

Spencer shakes his head. "You believed that I had unjustly hurt him."

Aaron stands and holds his young lover against him. "Spencer... Baby..." He whispers.

Spencer's eyes betray him as tears fall. "He ruined my Charles Dodgson paper," Spencer tells him, sobbing on his shoulder. "And I thought I did this all right! And... You hurt me! You called me..." Aaron hushes his boyfriend.

"I was wrong. Please don't leave me. Don't leave us," Aaron says. Spencer nods and moves away from Aaron. He unpacks his suitcase and hangs his clothes back up. Aaron leaves to make dinner and Spencer takes a bath.

Aaron knocks on the door an hour later to let him know food is done. Spencer gets out and wraps in a towel, a courtesy neither of them had performed since they'd begun having sex. Aaron is watching him come into the room.

"I don't feel like eating," Spencer says, quickly sliding his boxers on.

Aaron frowns."Are you sure?"

Spencer nods. "And I think... I'd prefer it if you slept on the couch tonight," he tells Aaron. Aaron looks down, but he accepts it. He grabs his pillow from the bed and walks out of the room.

Spencer lies in the bed and closes his eyes, though he knows sleep isn't coming easily. He remembers, word for word, in his head the tales of Hans Christian Anderson and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle until it is light outside and the sun begins to rise. Only then does he fall asleep.

* * *

Aaron makes Jack and himself a plate of food. He makes Spencer one too, but puts it in the fridge for later. Jack moves his food around his plate grumpily.

"Why does Spencer have to live here?" He asks. Aaron sighs. His appetite had died long ago.

"He's here because I asked him to live with me. I asked him," he elaborates when his son's mouth opens, "because we are in love."

Jack shakes his head. "Mommy says Spencer wants to be my new mommy so that I can't see her anymore. And she says he's just a convenient fuck," Jack says smugly.

Aaron can't believe what has just come out of his mouth. "She said that to you?" He nods his head. "That is a very disrespectful thing to say! And you do not use that language in this house, young man!"

Jack snaps his head over at his father. "I'm sorry..." He says, seeming frightened. Aaron leans his head on his hands.

"Did she say anything else?" He asks, needing to have a long conversation with his ex-wife.

"She calls him your boy-toy and says you abandoned us for him." Aaron is beyond angry.

"Jack, look at me." He says firmly. His son makes eye contact and maintains it. "First of all, I love you very much. I would never abandon you. That's why I fight so hard to get you here. I want you to live with me too, because I love you. Its mommy and I that don't want to live together. I didn't leave her for Spencer."

Aaron doesn't see it necessary to tell his son just yet that his mother is the one that asked for the divorce, and that she had been cheating.

"And second, Spencer means a lot to me. I wouldn't let him call you names and I'm not going to let you. You don't have to call him 'daddy Spencer' but you will either address him as Spencer or Mr. Reid."

His son nods. "Yes sir." Aaron sits back. "When Spencer wakes up, you're going to apologize." His son nods again. They finish their meal in silence.

When Aaron is putting Jack to bed, a little hand holds his. "So, no matter how much you love Spencer, you won't leave me?"

Aaron shakes his head. "I want to be with you and Spencer for the rest of my life."

* * *

Aaron wakes on the couch. It had been a long and restless night. He goes to the kitchen and stops in the doorway. Reid is making coffee. He's in his pajama pants and one of his cute little hobby shirts that he only wears at home.

He watches Reid sweeten his coffee and lean against the counter. They meet eyes and Reid takes a drink.

"You mind if I have a cup of that?" Spencer shakes his head and moves from the counter to the table and sits.

Aaron fills a cup of coffee without adding anything and sits across from his lover. "Do you want some breakfast?" Aaron asks softly.

"No thank you," Spencer says before taking a large mouthful of coffee.

Aaron frowns. "You've got to eat soon," he tells his already thin boyfriend.

Spencer looks up at him with a slight glare. "I know how to take care of myself. I'm not a child, remember? I'm a faggot boy-toy," he says before getting up and taking his coffee to the bedroom.

Aaron wants to kick himself. He'd really fucked up. His son walks into the kitchen and rubs his eyes. Aaron gets him a glass of juice and makes him some breakfast. He helps the child find clothing and then knocks on their bedroom door.

"I'm going to take Jack to school and then I'll be back… Do you… Do you want anything?" He asks through the door.

Spencer replies with a simple no and Aaron leaves with a sigh. He drops his son off with a hug and a kiss and the promise of returning to get him when school is over.

* * *

He returns home and finds Spencer once again making coffee. This time he tries a new tactic. He walks over to Spencer and pulls him into his arms. "Spencer, I'm sorry. It hurts to be away from you, so please… Can you possibly forgive me?"

Spencer doesn't say anything. Aaron releases him and runs a hand through his hair as he walks away.

"Maybe this is just over," he says, mostly to himself. "It's over, and I'll be here with Jack and you'll live somewhere else and we'll see other people. But we need to continue working well together, or that will be a problem."

He turns and looks into Spencer's sad eyes. "I value my job, Spencer."

Spencer nods. He is terrified of losing Aaron. Not only that, but he does love the man. They'd been together for a year now and living together for half of it. If Aaron makes him leave, he will have no other place to go.

"I don't want us to be over," Spencer says softly. He would rather be torn down every day by Aaron than be asked to leave the relationship. Aaron grabs Spencer back into his arms.

"Can you forgive me?" Spencer shakes his head. Not yet.

Aaron releases him. "Then I don't see how we can stay together." Aaron feels a twinge of guilt. He's using the overwhelming fear he know Reid has of being alone and losing the people around him.

Reid's arms quickly wrap around him. He can feel Spencer trembling. "Don't go…"

Aaron leans down and kisses a reluctant Reid. "Can you work on forgiving me?" Reid nods. Aaron's arms bring him closer. "I said the worst things possible to you, and I'm sorry. I know you'll never forget them, but I didn't mean it. I was angry and trying to hurt you. Next time, I'll come to you calmly and assess the situation."

He runs his hands down Spencer's sides. He can almost touch his hands together when they rest at his lover's waist. Spencer repeats his words in his mind. "Next time… Next time…"

* * *

When Aaron returns home with Jack after he's let out from school he pulls his son to the couch where Spencer is reading. Spencer looks up from his book at the disdain on the child's face. "Daddy said I need to apologize to you," he mutters.

Aaron pushes the boy closer. "I'm sorry I wasn't listening and that I hurted your paper," Jack says.

"Hurt, not hurted," Spencer says. Jack bites his lip."And… And I'm sorry I made daddy yell at you." That's the only thing the boy has said that seems genuine.

Spencer looks at him and nods. "Thank you for apologizing Jack," he says before going back to his book. Jack walks away and Aaron sighs. Spencer was still mad at both of them. He begins making dinner while Jack does his homework at the table.

* * *

"My teacher wants up to draw our families and I don't know what to draw," the boy admits to his father.

Aaron turns around with a frown. "Just draw your family." He tells the boy. He's not sure what the problem is.

Spencer comes in and makes himself a cup of coffee. "Spencer, are you my family?" Jack asks. His little eyes are focused on him and somewhat confused.

Spencer is somewhat surprised but still very hurt. "No," he answers before going into the living room with his cup.

Aaron is shocked and Jack seems to frown before drawing a woman with blonde hair. He assumes it is his ex-wife. Once the food is cooked he serves it onto three plates to cool and goes to the living room to find Spencer. He's zoned out; not reading or watching anything, but staring at a wall, probably thinking.

"You are his family," Aaron says. "I love you and he does too, even if he's not showing it."

Spencer looks at him. "I'm not his father; I'm not even his step-father. I'm just the weak little faggot that his father is fucking," Spencer repeats to him.

Aaron growls. "Do you also remember the part where I apologized and said I was completely wrong?"

Spencer stands up to refill his coffee. "We share a common interest by feeling love for a mutual person. That doesn't make us family," Spencer replies. He doesn't want to get his hopes up.

Aaron slams his hand to Spencer's face. He drops his coffee mug and hits the floor. He's dazed for a moment.

His first thought is that he's glad that was empty. The second is him wondering why it didn't break and deciding it must be the carpet. He lifts himself off the ground and Aaron still looks mad.

"Get in there and tell him you're family," Aaron hisses.

Spencer picks his mug up and walks into the kitchen. The boy is coloring grass beneath the drawings of his parents and self in slow, short lines. He's drawn his mother and father on opposite sides of the paper and him in the middle with a sad face.

Spencer puts the cup in the sink and sits across from the boy. "Spencer, your lip is bleeding!" Jack tells him. Spencer ignores him.

He grabs a crayon and draws a heart between Aaron and Jack. "We are family. We live together and eat together and we both love your father." The boy smiles a little and Spencer watches the boy make his caricature.

His lip is throbbing and he licks it every few seconds. "You should put a rag on that. You'll make it worse," the little boy tells him. Spencer shakes his head. He's not going to move until Aaron tells him to because he still looked mad.

His heart is clenching. Was this going to become normal? Would Aaron lash out physically every time they fought? Was it just when the fight was about Jack? Would he have to end it and break up his little almost-family?

"I'm going to draw Miss. JJ and Henry and Mr. Will and Mr. Morgan and Mr. Rossi and Miss. Prentiss and Garcia!" The boy says excitedly.

Spencer half-smiles at him. "I bet they would be really happy to know you consider them family."

The boy begins to focus on his drawing. Spencer feels a hand on his shoulder.

"Come upstairs so I can clean your lip," Aaron tells him. He looks at Jack once again but he doesn't look up. He follows Aaron up to the master bathroom and sits on the toilet seat.

Aaron drops down to one knee and dabs his lip. He's avoided looking into Spencer's eyes. He finishes and neither of them moves. Slowly he raises his head and looks at Spencer. Spencer's eyes bore into his. "You hit me," he says.

Aaron wants to cry. "You hurt his feelings," he responds. It's not an excuse; it's honesty. Spencer doesn't know what to say. He knows that Jack comes first. He encourages it... But at what point is Aaron going too far? Is hitting him for hurting Jack's feelings justified? He had been a little cold when telling the child that they weren't family.

Aaron kisses his lips softly. "I'm sorry I hit you," he tells the younger man. Spencer nods. Aaron shouldn't apologize. He'd deserved it. "I.. I.. I under s.. stand," Spencer stutters. Aaron pets him. "Thank you."

* * *

Aaron puts Jack to bed and Spencer is sitting up in their bed. He doesn't feel up to sleeping next to Aaron yet, but he doesn't want Aaron to end it and he is willing to do anything. Even if Aaron's son hates him... Even if their family laughs at him... Even if Aaron were to start beating him... At least he has a family now.

Aaron comes in and gets undressed for bed. Does Spencer ignore him if he makes an advance... Or should he initiate it in order to pacify him? Aaron looks at Spencer and is worried by the look on his face. He looks utterly repulsed and confused.

He sits down and pulls the younger man in for a kiss. "What are you thinking about?" He asks.

Spencer looks into his eyes. "If you want to try... you know... And I said no, but you can do it tonight..." Spencer stammers.

Aaron had explained his fantasies to Spencer once and they agreed on many, but there were a few Spencer said he would not participate in them. Was this permission for any of them?

"Anything I want?" Spencer nods without looking up at him. This is redemption. Aaron will defile his body and he will be back in good graces with him and will have given up part of himself in repentance.

Aaron flips him onto his belly and Spencer spreads himself.

* * *

Spencer is puking and Aaron waits outside of the bathroom door. Aaron had put him through to his limits. His stomach empties itself and he's shivering and holding onto the toilet. He doesn't want to move but he needs to shower.

He gets up on shaking legs and turns the shower on. "Spencer, let me help you," Aaron calls through the door.

"I.. I'm f..f..fine," Spencer calls out. "G..go to be..bed." He gags and has to stop talking and take a deep breath. Aaron doesn't respond so Spencer gets into the shower.

He'd lost a lot of blood. His logical mind notes that it's not nearly enough to kill him, but his body shows it that it's enough to weaken him. His self-loathing makes him rethink that fact. He really is the weak faggot Jack's father was fucking.

He feels like he's having an asthma attack and gasps for air. His body is sore and he doesn't want to live.

Aaron jimmies the lock and walks into the bathroom. Spencer is sitting in the shower with his eyes closed and breathing erratically.

Aaron shuts the water off and whispers soothing things in his ear. "Spencer, you need to breathe," he reminds him. Spencer makes himself think of happy things. Books he'd always loved. When he next opens his eyes he's in bed and its morning.

Aaron is asleep beside him. He moves and it hurts. The sheets still have blood on them. He gets out of bed and puts his clothes on quietly. He goes downstairs and sees that Jack is looking in the fridge. It's already ten in the morning.

"Spencer, is my daddy going to wake up soon? I'm hungry," the boy says.

Spencer shakes his head. Aaron must be worn out. "I... I'll make yo...you breakfas...st," he tells Jack. Jack frowns at Spencer.

"Did my daddy hit you again? You're talking funny and you look sad." Spencer shakes his head again. Best not to speak.

The boy sits down and Spencer makes enough food for the boy and his father. His own stomach was still bitter from the night before and threatened to unload itself every time he took a breath in through his nose.

"Spencer, do you love me?" The boy asks after almost twenty minutes of silence. Spencer had just set two plates of food on the table. He looks at the child with wide eyes.

"Of course I d... do, Jack. I l...love you very much," he tells him. The boy nods without smiling and eats his breakfast.

Spencer goes to their bedroom to wake Aaron. As soon as his eyes open and sits up and pulls Spencer close. "How are you feeling?" He asks. Spencer pulls back. "F... fine. Breakfast is read... ready," he tells his boyfriend.

Aaron gets up, slightly concerned about his boyfriend's continuing stutter. He goes down to the table and sees his son eating a large piece of bacon. There's one other plate and he looks at Spencer.

"Aren't you going to eat?" Spencer wraps his arms around his belly.

"I... I did. While... while I was cooking." Jack frowns. "I didn't see you eat anything," he says innocently. Aaron raises an eye brow at Spencer and Spencer feels panic and vile rise.

"I...I...I still feel il...ill from... from last night," he explains.

Aaron sits down and pat the seat next to him. "At least eat some toast," he says holding up one of his pieces. Spencer sits down and nibbles on the toast. Truth be told it felt good to have some food in him again.


	2. Aaron's Lie

They are at work the next day. Spencer had spent the night on the couch under the guise of insomnia and desire to read. He just didn't know if his body would be able to handle being that close to Aaron. His stutter had begun to go away. He had rubbed his wrist nervously so often that he'd injured it slightly. Aaron put a band-aid on it and given Spencer a worried look.

Jack hadn't spoken to Spencer all day and Spencer didn't try to initiate it. He had sat in the chair in the corner of the living room and thrown himself into reading for most of the day. Only when he heard the tell-tale snore of his lover did he feel safe enough to close his eyes and sleep. Safe might be too strong of a word, but he can't think.

He sits at his desk without greeting his coworkers. He eyes run over the papers he needs to fill out. He'd never been happier to have to fill out paperwork. He takes a large drink of coffee and notices that it's his last drink of coffee. He glances around the pen and deems it safe, as his coworkers were buried deep into their work.

Spencer goes to the break room and refills his coffee mug. From behind he feels hands rest on his shoulders. He now wishes it was a coworker. He'd love for Morgan to be behind him; telling him about his sexual exploits from the previous weekend.

"I'd like to see you in my office," Hotch tells him before walking away. Spencer takes a deep breath and follows the trail to his boss' office. He shuts the door and sits in the chair directly in front of the desk. "Is there something I can help you with, sir?" Hotch clears his throat. "This isn't about work," he tells Spencer. He'd already been able to guess that much.

"Jack has been acting out at school and his teacher would like for you, Haley and me to come to a parent-teacher meeting. We'd have to leave work early today to be there. Do you want to go?"

Spencer is surprised. How does he answer this? If he says yes he will have to listen to Jack and Haley talk about how much they hate him, but if he says no Aaron will think he doesn't care about Jack and possibly even assault him again. "Of course I'll go," Spencer answers quickly. Aaron smiles for a moment and leans forward to kiss his lover.

"Okay, we're leaving at about two, so come to my office and we'll go."

* * *

They leave extra early and Aaron kisses him as soon as they're in the car. "I missed you last night," Aaron tells him while loosening the younger man's tie. He starts the car and drives them home. They've still got forty-five minutes until the meeting. Aaron looks over at SPencer. They'd both removed their seat belts but hadn't left the car. "You're so beautiful Spencer. I don't deserve you, especially after the way I've acted this weekend," Aaron admits to him.

He takes one of Spencer's hands and squeezes. "I shouldn't have accepted when you told me I could do anything to you. I feel like I took advantage and bullied you into submission. I promise, Spencer. I promise you that it will never happen again."

Spencer smile and leans forward to kiss him. He grabs Spencer over and he rests in his superior's lap. "I love you Aaron," he says between kisses. "I love you too Spencer. So much," he promises.

* * *

After making love in the car they speed to the meeting. They're right on time; both holding hands until finding the classroom. Haley isn't there yet but they can see Jack entertaining his teacher with a story. They knock on the door and a young man waves them in. "Daddy!" The boy shouts before hugging his father close. He looks over at Spencer with confusion.

"Spencer? Are you one of my parents too?" Spencer looks to Aaron because he doesn't know how to answer the child. "Spencer is your family too, remember?" The child smiles and gives Spencer a small hug before sitting back down in his chair.

"Daddy, this is my desk. Mr. Skerrit said we cold sit here and talk," the boy says proudly. They follow the boy and sit in the surrounding desks.

"Hello, you must be Mr. Hotchner. I'm Andy Skerrit," he says as he shakes Aaron's hand. "This is my partner Spencer Reid," Aaron says politely. Skerrit holds a hand out to shake with Spencer, but he just waves nervously. Skerrit never loses his smile though he does seem to find Spencer slightly odd.

Spencer can see that Jack's teacher has the drawing that Jack had made of family. Haley, Aaron, Jack and Spencer were all circled in thick purple crayon. "While we're waiting for Mrs. Hotchner, may I just say that having Jack in class is very delightful? He's a model student. Always very respectful and clean and he listens very well."

Spencer and Aaron both smile. "He's a good kid. He acts very similarly at home," Aaron tells the teacher. "I should wait for your wife... ex-wife... But I'm curious. Jack says he got into trouble the other night." Aaron raises an eye brow. "Yes, he did. I don't see how that is any concern to his academics, however. He was sent to his room for disrespecting Spencer."

Spencer feels his cheeks heat up. This was his fault. "I understand that sir. I am merely trying to understand if that is normal behavior for him, or if it is part of whatever is bothering him lately." Haley walks in at the moment and Jack runs to her to give her a hug. The teacher introduces himself and invites her to sit on the other side of Jack. Once everyone is sitting Skerrit shows them the drawing of family.

"I was a little confused by this drawing. You see, we had the students do this project last year also. We do it every year so that they can see how their surroundings change. Jack went from a mother and a father to a mother, two fathers and a lot of aunts and uncles. This could be non-related, but it coincides with his out of control behavior. Your son has always been one of the best students in my class. He seems to be having trouble paying attention lately. He's also been moody. I realize now that there has not only been a separation of households, but an addition of parental figures," he says staring at Spencer.

"I wonder if this was done too rapidly for Jack to become used to it. It's probably been very overwhelming for him," he looks back at Aaron and Haley. Aaron is the one that speaks up. "When Haley and I separated we sat him down and explained what was happening. He wasn't happy, but he understood and we knew that with time he would be alright. Neither of us were abandoning him, so we weren't concerned that he would feel neglected. As for Spencer, Jack has known Spencer his whole life. Obviously not in the sense that we were romantically involved, but in a working relationship. I explained to his that Spencer was going to be living with us and we've had many conversations about it. It will take time for him to adjust and we both understand that. However, I'm not going to kick Spencer out or end it with him just because Jack doesn't care for our relationship."

The teacher loses his smile for a moment. "I am not suggesting that at all Mr. Hotchner. I am merely suggesting that it be less confusing for Jack. Does Mr. Reid discipline him at all? Or care for him when you're not around?" Spencer feels shame when he thinks about his first adventure in watching Jack Hotchner. "And is the relationship between you too healthy for him to be around?"

Aaron locks his jaw and glares at the teacher for a moment. "Spencer knows his boundaries when it comes to Jack. He treats him with love and respect and has never tried to take the place of either if us as a parent. If this meeting was just to crucify our relationship then I believe it's time to go." He stands and holds a hand out for Jack. Jack gets up and follows Aaron out.

Spencer stands awkwardly and turns to stand. "Think about what I'm saying, Mr. Reid. Is it really healthy for you to be around Jack? Is your relationship conducive to the upbringing of a child? He's confused about what family means and he's worried about how to act around you. He said he got you in trouble with Mr. Hotchner once. He claims that his father hit you."

Spencer's eyes go wide. "Aaron is a good father," he says before turning to leave. Aaron is buckling Jack in and Spencer gets into the car.

* * *

When they get home Aaron sends Jack to the kitchen to do his homework with the promise of a snack. He flops on the couch after making himself a glass of whiskey and sighs.

Spencer sits on the coffee table in front of him. "I think that the teacher might have a point. How healthy is our relationship?"

Aaron glares. "Apperantly not very if every time you open your mouth about it you say something profoundly stupid." Spencer doesn't react. He holds it and and tries not to dwell on the pain coursing inside of him.

"He saw you hit me," Spencer says quietly. Aaron's head snaps up so that he's making eye contact with his lover. "He did?"

Spencer looks away. "He told his teacher." Aaron curses under his breath. He sets his drink down and leans forward to embrace his lover.

"Spencer, I'm sorry."Spencer doesn't return the hug. He focuses on the warmth that Aaron is transferring to him and begging the darkness he feels inside to go away.

"I think we need to talk to him about it." Aaron shakes his head. He doesn't want to admit to what he's done. "What do we tell him?" Spencer tilts his head. "The truth?"

Hotch gets up. "I'm not admitting to my son that I hit you. We'll come up with an excuse. We'll say we were sparring, or something." Spencer stands and speaks before he can think.

"You did hit me! He wouldn't have seen it if it hadn't happened," he almost shouts. Aaron glares but his hands stay by his side. Jack walks into the room looking morose. "Are you two fighting again?"

They look over at the child and then back at each other. This was not a conversation to have in front of a child. "Are you so pathetic that you need me to debase myself in front my son? Do you really want him remembering this and possibly using it as an excuse?"

Spencer feels guilty and selfish. He's not used to feeling selfish. He wraps his arms around himself and turns to Jack. "Sweetheart, we're not fighting. We're having a discussion. We are in love, and people who are in love don't fight. They talk. The other day, when you saw daddy hit me... We were playing. Wrestling. Your daddy would never hit me unless we were playing. I'm sorry you were confused," Spencer lies before walking out of the room and to their bedroom.

* * *

Aaron is sitting on the couch, having every intention to sleep there though he is not sure why he feels like he's done something wrong. It's perfectly natural to not want your children to see the worst of you. Jack is too young to have to know about domestic violence. But Spencer is right in saying that it never should have happened.

He gets off the couch but leaves his bedding. He knocks on their door and waits to be given access. His boyfriend is in pajama pants and a hobby shirt lying atop the covers. "Can we talk?" Aaron asks softly. Spencer nods numbly.

Aaron sits on the bed and grabs Spencer's feet into his lap. He rubs them idly while he speaks. "I shouldn't have asked you to lie to Jack. We weren't playing, I hit you like a brute. I've been really upset with the transition from Haley and me and Jack to Haley and Jack and us and Jack. I'm not using that as an excuse, but it's the truth. I snapped at you because I was upset with myself."

Spencer pulls his feet back and sits next to Aaron. His hand lies on Aaron's.

"I won't let it happen again Spencer. I'm never going to hit you again and I'm never going to demean you like I've done," he pulls Spencer's face close and kisses him. "All I ask is we make time for Jack to be with us as a family to help him. This has been hard on all of us, but you're the only one that hasn't been lashing out."

Spencer leans his Aaron. "I've considered it. I even went to go see a movie during my lunch break," Spencer admits. Aaron wraps his arms around him. "I'm so sorry. Do you still feel the need to... " he waves a hand at Spencer's arm. Spencer shakes his head. Aaron was asking a tough question. Of course he still wanted to, but the desire was no longer overwhelming him. Spencer pulls Aaron into the bed and snuggles close to him.

He can still hear the words Aaron had belittled him with. Did he really think Spencer was pathetic? He felt pathetic. The team treated him like he was. Pathetic implied disgust. Was Aaron disgusted with him? And how many times had he heard the apology of 'it'll never happen again' in cases and his own life? He'd be strong _even though he's pathetic_ and he'll be there for Jack _ even though he's just a faggot boy-toy_ and he will accept the brunt of Aaron's unease _because this entire problem is his fault._

Tomorrow they'd speak with Jack and try gluing back together the fragmented pieces of this family.


	3. Jack's Lament

Spencer is doing the dishes after breakfast and Jack had asked Aaron to play outside with him. He's pushing his son on the swing for a few minutes before sitting on the porch to take a break. Jack crawls onto his lap and leans against him. "Did you hit Spencer again?" The boy asks.

Aaron is surprised. "Of course not buddy. I love Spencer, and when I hit him, I messed up. It's not going to happen again." Jack doesn't know if he should believe his father or not. "He seems sad. You know what would cheer him up?" The child asks. Aaron waits for the answer and expects it to be outrageous.

"A picnic," the boy says. Aaron considers it for a moment before agreeing. "Go get ready and I'll let Spencer know." The child races up the stairs and Aaron enters the kitchen. He wraps his arms around Spencer's tiny waist and nuzzles his neck.

"Jack says you look sad. He suggests a picnic. What do you say?" Spencer turns around and smiles at the look on his lover's face. Apprehensive and guilty. "I think that's a great idea. I'll start making some sandwiches." Aaron leans forward and melds their lips together. "I love you," he murmurs against the genius' lips. Spencer pulls back with a smile. "I love you too. Will you bring my shoes down when you're done?"

* * *

While playing Jack observes his father and Spencer. The way the laugh, talk, eat and look at each other. Jack sees his father and Spencer sitting close and they both look happy. They even kiss a few times. He joins them and Spencer puts an arm around him.

Jack may be young, but he is smart. His father's eye for the esoteric had been passed down. Spencer Reid did /not/ like physical contact. Even with people he loved, he wasn't a feel-y kind of guy. For him, it was an exertion So to have Spencer willingly making contact spoke volumes to the young boy. Spencer really did care about him.

After they get home Jack sits in he living room with them. "Spencer?" He asks. Spencer turns to him and smiles. "May I call you my daddy?" Spencer is speechless. "Well, actually, I have a daddy already. May I call you my papa?" Spencer nods. He is smiling awkwardly. "Is that okay?" He asks his daddy. Aaron nods happily.

"Okay. Daddy, if you ever hit my papa again, I will stop loving you." The adults aren't sure what to say. "I told you, it won't happen again," Aaron says. Jack nods. "My teacher asks about you a lot."

Aaron and Spencer are surprised. "What does he ask?" Jack blushes a little. "If you guys hug and kiss and if I've seen you together naked." Spencer is mortified. Aaron is seething. "He asks you that during class?" Spencer asks. Jack shakes his head. "He spends a lot of time at my mommy's house." Spencer looks at Aaron as he slowly rises and pulls out his cell phone.

He bites his lip and looks back to Jack. "Am I in trouble?" Jack asks. Spencer pulls him into his lap. "Of course not. None of this is your fault. You know we love you, right?" Jack nods and rests against his papa's chest. He loved Spencer too, he thinks. Spencer makes life more complicated, but he also makes it more happy.

They discover that Haley has been seeing Jack's teacher and has been for about a year before the divorce. Aaron goes to the principal and pulls his son from the school. He agrees that the situation is inappropriate but there isn't much that can be done and encourages Aaron to get full custody.

Jack is crushed when he's told he will no longer be attending his school. He cries and is sent to bed early that night. Spencer lies in Aaron's arms after having made love vigorously. "Why don't you try to get full custody? She hardly seems him as it is." Aaron pets his boyfriend's soft hair. "It's not that easy. She could use my job and our relationship against me."

Spencer hadn't considered that. He kisses Aaron's chest. "If we get married, can I adopt him?" He asks. Aaron's hand stops petting him. "Why would you want to do that?" Spencer is surprised that he has to ask. "I love him Aaron. I thought it was pretty obvious." Aaron kisses him again and Spencer tries keeping up. "Of course Spencer. God I love you," Aaron whispers before entering him again that night.


	4. Spencer Breaks

They soon find that it's not necessary to fight for custody. They receive notice that if Aaron is willing to relieve her from paying child support she will willingly relinquish her custody to him. He calls her for an explanation and she vaguely explains that she and her new husband are expecting and moving to be with his family. It disgusts Aaron but he signs the papers.

Aaron comes home to find Spencer sitting a the table with Jack. "So mommy doesn't want me anymore?" The child asks. Aaron is angry that his baby feels unwanted. "No, Jack. Your mommy loves you. She just doesn't think she would do the best job in raising you. That's why she wants your daddy to do it right now." Spencer explains. Aaron smiles a little. Papa Spencer, the diplomat. "Your mommy and daddy both love you so much, Jack. I love you so much. We all want you to be happy ans safe and healthy.

Aaron walks in and takes a seat beside his son. "Hey buddy. How are you feeling?" Jack tries to smile. "A little better. I thought mommy hated me." Aaron lifts his son into his lap. "Of course not. How could anyone hate you?"

"Spencer should have hated me when I broke his paper, and he didn't," Jack says. Spencer bites his lip. "I was very upset with you, but I love you." Jack gets down and hugs Spencer. "Why don't we go visit JJ and Will for a while?" They smile and call JJ to see if lunch would be okay.

* * *

They get in the car and Aaron sends an annoyed glance to Spencer. He'd been texting for the better part of their time at JJ's house. He'd asked what the problem was, but Spencer said it was nothing. They'd stopped to get groceries and Spencer had been so distracted that he'd hardly paid attention to Aaron. He'd even grabbed the wrong kind of milk.

* * *

Spencer giggles at a text he gets from Derek. He's likening himself to Roman nobility in his sexual conquests. Aaron's eye brows crease. "What's so funny?" Spencer's smile fades a little. "Derek sent me a funny message," he explains.

In a non-work environment Aaron tended to act jealously about the way Spencer and Derek interact. When they're co-agents everything is fine. It's when they smile together or talk alone that a darkness comes to Aaron's eyes. Spencer honestly doesn't understand at all. Derek is his co-worker; his brother. They have each other's back. They sometimes share tales of their personal adventures and talk to each other for comfort. Spencer had always believed that that was what friends did.

Aaron frowns and Spencer worries that he's in trouble. "I'm getting sick of this Reid," Aaron says. Jack is sitting in the back looking out the window. "Sick of what?" Spencer asks, confused.

"Sick of you! Flirting with every walking thing with a dick!" Spencer is shocked. Aaron never swears in front of his son; and still rarely without Jack. "I don't flirt with anyone," Spencer tells him. Why isn't it as obvious to Aaron as it is to everyone else?

"What about the cashier today?" Spencer blinks and recalls the word for word conversation he'd had with the man ringing them up earlier.

"The man who said my tie was the purple of his wife's favorite color?" Spencer asks. "Don't try to sound innocent! You were so eager to be closer to him." He then mimics Spencer's voice poorly. "Oh, it's my favorite color too!"

Aaron glares but his eyes don't leave the road. "You wanted to identify with his wife, right? So that he'd find you attractive."

Spencer is almost speechless. "Stop the car and let me out," he commands. Aaron looks over at him. "I'm on the freeway. I can't just pull over." Spencer begins texting and Aaron grabs his phone and shoves it in his pocket.

"Give me my phone back!" Spencer says, reaching for it. Aaron grabs his wrist and squeezes until Spencer whimpers. "I will. Eventually. When are you going to be a man and stop running from your problems?" Spencer doesn't respond. He sits quietly for a moment until Aaron continues.

"I guess that's the drug addict in you. Escape the problem instead of fix it. You're nothing but a junky whore." Spencer feels his breathing constrict. "Papa, you did drugs?" Jack asks. Spencer has tears falling down his face. "A long time ago," he answers softly. He brings his knees up under his chin and buries his face.

The rest of the ride is silent and when they get home Spencer just wants to sleep. He helps Jack out and grabs the bags of what they'd bought and hauls them inside. Once inside he pets his step-son and heads to his bedroom.

He dresses in pajama pants and a hobby shirt. He barely has time to slip into bed before Aaron enters the room and tosses his phone to him. "Morgan wants to know if you're free tonight. The answer is no," he says before walking away. Spencer bites his lip and answers Morgan by asking when he should be ready.

He takes a shower and gets ready. "I said you aren't going out. Not with him," Aaron says. Spencer walks past him. "I'm an adult and I'm going out with my co-worker, my best friend, and my brother to hang out and talk. Then, I will come home to the only person I love romantically."  
"You'll have to face the consequences," Aaron says. Spencer is spooked but walks out the door when Morgan arrives.

* * *

Spencer comes home around midnight and takes his scarf off. "Did you have fun?" Aaron asks once he's in the bedroom. Spencer nods. "I drank a little, danced a little and talked about anything but work."

Aaron backhands him. "Talked about everything? About how much you want him? Want to suck his dick, and all that?" Spencer shakes his head. His head is still buzzed and a little fuzzy. Aaron knocks him onto the bed. "Is he bigger than I am? I'm just dying to know." He holds Spencer's chest down with one hand and begins pulling his pants off.

Spencer begins to panic and tries to squirm away. "What are you doing? Stop!" Aaron grabs Spencer's arm and pulls him up before wrapping the arm around his back and thrusting him onto the bed. Spencer cries out in pain. Aaron is one firm pull from dislocating his shoulder.

He pulls the pants off and yanks his boxers down. "Aaron, stop. Don't do this, please? Don't do this. I love you, and and I promise to, to give myself to you, but p..please d..d..don't," Spencer shakes as he begs. Aaron tugs Spencer's arm before forcing his legs apart. "Since he's so much bigger you shouldn't need preparation, right?" Spencer is crying into the quilt that covers their bed.

Aaron begins pushing into him and he tries to move away. "No! Let go of me!" He yells. Aaron forces him down as flat as he can and pulls the arm enough for it to snap. Spencer cries out in pain but Aaron doesn't release the arm. He lies still and tries to control his movement, both voluntary and not so he doesn't further damage his arm. It stings every time Aaron' powerful thrusts shift him.

When he finishes he gently moves Spencer's arm into a more natural position. Spencer is sniffling and has his eyes trained to a spot on the wall. "I'll take you to the hospital for your shoulder once I get us cleaned up and I can get a hold of Jessica. What are you going to tell them happened?' Aaron asks while he wipes Spencer clean. "I... I came home a...and I was d...drinking and I'm a...a lightweight, and I fell going d...down the stairs," he answers obediently.

* * *

Spencer refuses pain medication and they pop it back into place and put it in a sling. During the car ride home Aaron looks over at him.

"You could have taken the medicine. I would have helped you and made sure you didn't abuse it." Spencer, in all of his pain and agony. snaps. "I'm sorry but I don't think I can trust you to save me from abuse." Aaron sighs and parks the car but doesn't move to get out. "I deserve that. You're right. I don't know what came over me Spencer. I love you, you know I do. I wouldn't be so jealous if I didn't love you."

Spencer unbuckles his seat belt carefully. "You're not acting like you do. I'm afraid of you Aaron. I used to respect you. I used to, to love you and think that we would be together forever," he says. Tears run down his face. "But I can't live like this forever and if I don't leave you'll end up killing me. I tried forgiving you when you put me down, even when you hit me, but you forced me to have sex with you. You raped me, and I can't forgive that."

Aaron gets out of he car and Spencer closes his eyes; he expect to be beaten or killed for speaking against Aaron. His door opens and Aaron kisses his cheek. He looks over and Aaron kneels down. "What do I tell our son when he asks why his papa is gone? I'm sorry Spencer, but please don't do this. I'll sleep in the living room and make you breakfast every morning. I'll go to anger management meetings and I'll change. You of all people should have some faith that a person can change," he says.

Spencer winces. He's using the guilt Spencer feels from being a drug addict. "And I know you love Jack, Spence. Please baby, we need you. Please stay with us."

Spencer bites his lip and nods to Aaron. He'll stay. "Only if you go to meetings and, and only for Jack until you've proven yourself." Aaron smiles and kisses Spencer's cheek again before helping him from the car.


	5. Aaron's Bride

Spencer sleeps in their bed and Aaron sleeps on the couch, as promised. He is even served breakfast in bed. Aaron helps him cut the food and informs him that he's on sick leave for a while. Spencer offers to take Jack to school and Aaron begrudgingly agrees. Once he's out of the house Spencer jumps up and grabs the suitcase he'd packed the night before and runs to Jack's room. He packs a few items and gets his step-son dressed.

"Are you taking me to school papa?" The boy asks. Spencer shakes his head. "We need to go somewhere else first, okay? But it's a secret." Jack rubs an arm along Spencer's sling. "My dad hurt you. I heard you crying. You were in your bedroom, not on the stairs." Spencer has to keep himself from sobbing.

"It's okay. But you need to keep this a secret, okay?" The boy nods. Spencer calls for a cab and they wait outside.

Spencer walks into the shelter trying to fit in. He's stopped almost immediately. "You can't be in here. You need to leave or I'm calling the police," the woman says to him and she glances at Jack for a moment. Spencer had been worried about this.

"Please, I don't know where else to go," he tells her. He steps back and lifts his shirt so she can see the bruising. He doesn't know it, but it wasn't necessary. She could already see the bruising on his face.

"This is a women's shelter. We can have any men over thirteen in here," she tells him. Spencer wraps his arms around himself. "Is there a… a shelter for men?" The woman shakes her head. "Men are usually the brutes."

Spencer looks down. "He will find me, no matter where I go. He has a lot of power and I don't have anywhere to go," he says. He's started to cry. "I can't help you. Is there any way to just… break it off with… him?"

Spencer snaps his glare up at her. "Have you ever been beaten by a man twice your size?' He asks. The woman nods silently. "Do you remember feeling like no one could help you? That he'd just kill you and it would be over?" She nods again. "And do you remember how relieved you were when you got out? You got out because no one told you to just go back home and try to make friends!" Spencer yells before turns and takes Jack's hand so they can walk out the door.

He goes back home and sits on the couch. Maybe Aaron would let him be if he left. Jack leans into his side. Would Aaron ever hurt Jack? If he took him along and left he would be a kidnapper. But if he left and Aaron hit Jack he would never forgive himself.

"Papa, are we leaving daddy?" Jack asks as he yawns. "It's a secret Jack. You can't tell anyone, especially daddy." Jack nods and curls on his lap. "I don't like daddy anymore." Spencer pets his step-son. "He's your daddy," Spencer says. Jack holds one of Spencer's hand protectively. "He hurts you. I don't love anyone that hurts you."

Spencer wipes his eyes and mentally berates himself for ever putting Jack Hotchner in this position. "I love you, sonny boy. Why don't we take a nap?" He takes Jack up to the bed he shares with Aaron and they lie down.

He's woke up by Aaron. "Hey, I'm going to carry Jack to bed. You need to let him go," Aaron whispers. Spencer lifts his arm from around the boy and listening to Aaron's footsteps. He feels dread in the pit of his stomach when the footsteps begin coming back to their bedroom.

Aaron begins undressing and Spencer sits up. "Thanks for staying home today," Aaron says. Spencer nods. Aaron gets into bed and yawns. "Was he any trouble?" Spencer shakes his head. "Jack is perfect," he answers. Maybe if he was too Aaron wouldn't feel the need to hurt him.

Aaron kisses the side of his neck and Spencer grips the covers. "Aaron, my shoulder..." he reminds him. Aaron kisses his cheek and apologizes. "I came back to ask if I could take another pillow to the couch with me." Spencer nods and hands him one. Aaron kisses him again and turns to leave, but doesn't make it out the door before Spencer stops him.

"I want to get married," Spencer says. Aaron turns around, very surprised. "To me?" He asks. Spencer nods and licks his dry lips. "If you're really going to change, I want to do this all perfectly. I want to get married and I want to adopt Jack.. and you can come back to sleeping on our bed."

Aaron lifts the younger man into an embrace. "Okay Spencer. We can sign the papers tomorrow. I love you so much," he says before kissing Spencer and easing him back onto the bed. "Just be careful of my shoulder, please," Spencer says. Aaron kisses he damaged arm and helps flip Spencer onto his belly before undressing them.

It makes Spencer sick. Pretending to be okay with sharing a bed- giving himself over. But he needs it. They can get married and then he will adopt Jack and then he will find a way to escape, but this way he will he will have legal rights to Jack. Escape isn't worth it if it means leaving his son behind.


	6. Jack's Uncle Derek

It doesn't go well when Aaron finds one of the suitcases hidden in the attic. He calmly walks down the stairs to where Spencer and Jack and eating cereal.  
Sweetheart, Daddy and Papa need a minute, okay? Can you turn your cartoons on and eat breakfast in the living room?" Jack nods and takes his bowl into the living room. Spencer has stopped eating and is staring at Aaron. Aaron is waiting to hear cartoons in the other room. As soon as he does his eyes lock onto Spencer's and Spencer knows Aaron has found him out.

"I found your suitcase in the attic," Aaron says calmly. Spencer is shaking. "It's just some stuff that I didn't have a place for," he lies. Aaron pulls him up by his hair and slams him into the counter. "Your favorite sweater vest? Jack's socks? Those are things you can't find a place for?" Spencer tries to get away but Aaron's grip is too tight. "Please Aaron, stop it. Jack will hear us..." Spencer begs. Aaron throws Spencer to the ground and drags him into the living room where their son is.

"Has Papa Spencer been talking about leaving me?" He asks the boy. He shakes his head and Aaron kicks Spencer in the gut. "Is he trying to leave me?" Aaron yells at his son. The boy begins crying and shakes his head. Aaron steps on Spencer's ribs and Spencer squeaks. "You're lying for Spencer now?" He asks his son. The boy shakes his head. "Daddy, please! Stop hurting him!"

Aaron raises his foot and Spencer takes a deep breath in. Aaron begins to kick him everywhere. "And you know what Spencer? When I'm done with you, I think I'm going to teach my son who the boss really is around here," Aaron threatens. Spencer gasps. He must do whatever it takes to keep Aaron's focus on him. "Jack, run!" Spencer yells. The boy doesn't move though. He's crying and trying to hit his father away from Spencer.

"Don't you dare hurt him Aaron," Spencer growls as he attempts to rise from the floor. Aaron smiles. "I wouldn't hurt my own son. I'm just going to show him who the boss is," Aaron says. Spencer grabs Jack and tries to get out of the door but Aaron grabs him by his hair and threatens to dislocate his shoulder again. Spencer releases Jack and tells him to hide.

"Go to your room Jack," Aaron says smoothly. "You're not old enough to see this. I'll come get you when it's over." Aaron begins undressing Spencer and Spencer screams. He fights like a wild animal caught in a trap. It scares Jack so much that he runs to the bedroom. He can hear his Papa screaming and he looks around for the phone. He looks for his uncle Derek's name before calling.

"Pretty Boy, I'm a little busy right now," Derek says before giggling at whomever he is with. "Uncle Derek? I... I need help!" Jack says. Suddenly Derek is all ears. "Hey there buddy. What's wrong?" Jack sniffles. "Daddy is hurting Papa Spencer real bad and, and I'm not big enough to make him stop. Papa Spencer is bleeding!"

Derek doesn't know what to say. "Stay in your room buddy. Lock your door and stay in there until I come to get you, okay?" The boy agrees and they hang up. Derek quickly calls the police while speeding his way to Spencer and Aaron's house. When he busts the door down he sees something he's never wanted to see before.

Spencer has been obviously beaten. He is on his stomach and not moving, save for the undulating way Aaron's thrusting shifts his weak body. Aaron looks at him with surprise. "Get away from him Hotch. I will shoot you and you know that." Hotch pulls out of Spencer's body and pulls his pants back on. Spencer still isn't moving, but he's closed his eyes.

"This is breaking and entering, Agent Morgan. How do you explain yourself?" Derek kneels near Spencer's body and tries to wake him. "We got a noise complaint from one of the neighbors," he answers. "When I got to the door I heard screaming, so I let myself in. Common police work, Hotchner." Spencer looks at Derek pathetically. "Please find Jack," Spencer says.

"Don't worry sugar. He's at a neighbor's house," Morgan lies. Hotch is surprised. He hadn't seen Jack leave... But he also hadn't been paying much attention. Then it all hits him. He'd beaten his boyfriend again... In front of his child. He'd almost raped said boyfriend in front of his child. What kind of a father does things like that? Why can't he control his anger around Spencer?

Morgan lifts Spencer into his arms and lifts him up. He walks the man to his car and sits him in the passenger seat. He goes back in and knocks on Jack's door. "Buddy, it's uncle Derek." The door opens and the tiny boy is still hiccuping. "Come on sweetheart. I have Papa Spencer in the car already," he says before lifting the boy.

When they reach the living room there are police arresting Aaron. Morgan flashes his badge and lets them know where they can find him. He buckles Jack into the car and looks over at his best friend. "We're going to go to JJ's house to drop him off and then I'm taking you to the hospital." As soon as he says that there are two synced shouts of "no!" from the front and back seat.

"I want to stay with Papa," Jack says. "You need to go to the hospital Reid. If there isn't enough evidence he will get out of jail and get Jack back and possibly do this again. He might even begin doing this to him!" Spencer look at his little step-son. He looked tired and scared. "Okay, let's go..." Spencer gives in.

Jack and Derek sit in the waiting room. The police come to get a statement from Jack and enter Spencer's room to get one from him. Derek keeps the young boy close to him. "You did the right thing Jack. You are a very brave boy." Jack smiles before laying his head down in Derek's lap. It's an hour and a half later before they can see Spencer.

Jack was exhausted but refused to sleep before seeing his Papa. Spencer has been cleaned up and is being bandaged around the ribs. "He only broke two this time," Spencer says through clenched teeth. "This has happened before?" Derek asks. Spencer nods. "Only a few times..." He tries to justify. "We were about to leave. We'd tried shelters and no one would take us in. We were just going to get on a plane to anywhere and start a new life, but Aaron found my suitcase in the attic and went crazy..." Spencer explains.

Derek kisses his best friend. "Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you come to me? I would have helped you! I would have taken both of you in and protected you!" Spencer begins sniffling and Derek apologizes. "Pretty Boy, you know I have feelings for you. You know I would do anything for you, so why stay with such a monster?" Spencer shrugs. "Love is stupid..."


	7. Derek's Home

Derek's house would need to become a safe haven. A place that father and child felt safe and comfortable in, and Derek knew that. He had written down the channels that aired cartoons and the hours in which they played. He'd made sure to have coffee and creamer in abundance. Mac and cheese, chicken nuggets and juice.

Derek doesn't try to fool himself, either. He knows that these things aren't magically going to pull them out of the depression they're in. Jack's not going to drink a box of juice and suddenly stop caring that his mother doesn't want him and that his father beat and raped his Papa while he stood mere feet away. But he hoped that it would comfort him, even slightly.

"Hey Spencer, can you come into the kitchen?" Derek asks. They'd been at his house for a month now. Spencer is biting his lip. This is what he'd been waiting for. Either Derek would be sick of them and ask him to leave or he would want repayment. Spencer knows that Derek has been in love with him. He assumes that that is what he will ask for in return, and he will accept. He would do anything to protect Jack.

Derek hugs Spencer and Spencer hesitantly returns it. He sits down at the table and Spencer follows. "Pretty Boy, are you and Jack doing alright? You hardly talk to me, and I just want to know if there's anything else I should be doing for you." Spencer shakes his head. "There isn't a lot that can be done. Jack is having to deal with finding out that his hero is one of the worst kinds of people... And I have to get over loving someone enough to let them abuse me," he answers honestly.

Derek takes one of Spencer's hands. "I will never be able to explain to you how much I admire your courage. To go through all of that... Just to protect that little boy in there." Spencer feels himself tearing up. He'd never considered any other option. He could have just left the first time and never said anything else about it, but Aaron always brought Jack up and Spencer was not willing to hurt Jack.

"Thank you, Derek. Are.. Are you sure we're not in your way too often? I appreciate the help, but I don't want you to get sick of us." Derek leans forward and kisses Spencer softly on the lips. "This is what I've always wanted... Just with a different reasoning behind it. I am never going to get sick of you. As for Jack- He's the coolest kid I've ever met. You're both welcome here forever."

* * *

Spencer leaves Jack with Jessica and goes to work with Derek. The BAU is quiet and Spencer feels like everyone is watching him. He quickly sits at his desk and wonders who the temporary replacement for Hotch will be.

"Agent Reid, I need to see you in my office," Strauss says firmly. Spencer stands and exchanges glances with Derek before following Strauss. He sits down and she looks at him with a sigh. "You and Supervisory special agent Hotchner were engaged in a relationship?" She asks. Spencer begins rubbing his wrist.

"We were, ma'am. I've no doubt that you know why he's been arrested." Spencer replies. She nods her head and looks through some of her paperwork. "We do not allow relationships between members of the same team. When and if SSA Hotchner returns to work he will be punished accordingly. As for you- I'm sorry but you're fired."

Spencer's breathing hitches. "I'm being fired?" Strauss hands him the paperwork and apologizes again. Spencer walks out of her office and back to his desk. Derek raises an eyebrow at him. He folds the termination paper into an airplane and throws it over to Derek. He watches as the goofy smile slowly fades.

Spencer packs his belongings and walks out of the building.

* * *

He gets Jack from Jessica and returns to Derek's home. "Papa, I miss daddy." Jack tells him quietly. Spencer wraps his thin arms around the boy. "Me too... sometimes," he admits.

Derek wakes him up when he returns home. "I'm going to start making dinner. Is there anything in specific you want?" Spencer shakes his head. "They've named me the temporary head of the BAU," Derek tells him. Spencer doesn't have to force the smile on his face. "You deserve the title, Derek. You're one of the best."

Derek stirs whatever it is he's decided to cook. "I'm thinking about accepting one of the teaching jobs they've offered me at the University." Spencer says. "I'm not sure, though. I don't know how I'd handle having to talk in front of so many students all the time." Derek wishes Spencer was more excited.

"Pretty Boy, you'd be great! Have yo considered teaching the new recruits at the FBI?" Spencer laughs a little and shakes his head. "I'm the poster child for disaster. I would be a bad role model for how to be a safe agent."

They both laugh at the truth in this. "Have you thought about giving yourself a break and staying home? Maybe writing some books about all of that amazing stuff you have crammed in your head." Spencer thinks about it. "I could teach and write. Staying home isn't a viable because it doesn't bring any money in."

Derek sighs and turns the food off. "Spencer, baby doll. You can stay here, with me. I work and I have a house and I will take care of you. And Jack." Spencer leans forward and kisses Derek on the lips. Derek kisses back but pulls away. "That is not what I want in return. I just want to see you happy again, Pretty Boy. I'm okay in the friend zone."

* * *

Spencer and Derek had finally set the guest room up for Jack. Now Jack has his own room and Derek has his room back. "Papa, is Derek going to be my new daddy?" Spencer smiles. "No, baby. We aren't going to be with each other like that, but he is still my best friend and your uncle Derek." Jack smiles. "I think you like each other," Jack mentions.

Spencer sighs. "Even if we did, it's too early for us to be in love. Maybe one day," he says. It satisfies Jack enough for him to go to sleep.


	8. Strauss' office

Spencer and Jack are clean and dressed when the BAU arrives for dinner. The team takes turns giving the duo fragile hugs.

They all sit around the table while Derek brought food out. He'd make a lasagna. "Now Rossi, I don't want to hear anything about how you and yours could have made it better," Derek warns playfully.

The team laughs lightly at the banter and Rossi shrugs in a well-mannered way. They kept up the conversation and occasionally included Jack. The little boy was more talkative than Spencer, but just barely.

"So Spencer, are you thinking about taking out of the teaching positions that are local? I can't imagine any university turning you away," JJ asks in her mothering voice. Spencer shrugs. "I considered it. It would be the easiest option for me and Bean," he says and he pats his step-son's shoulder.

"Would you even want to stay local?" Emily asks before taking a large bite from her breadstick. "I guess it wouldn't be necessary anymore, but you're all here and you're the closest thing to family that either of us has anymore."

* * *

When dinner is over and deserts have been eaten people begin to leave. They hug the broken boys once again before promising to be back soon.

Spencer takes Jack to his room and tucks him in for bed before heading to the living room. Derek had already cleaned up the dinner mess and was watching some soft of sports show while having a beer. Spencer sits beside him and patiently waits for a break in the program so they can talk.

"Go ahead Spence. Did you have fun at all?" Spencer nods his head. "It was great to see the team. Jack said it made him feel safer. I just feel sad. I'm not one of you guys any more. I'm just a weirdo that you've all formed an odd attachment to."

Derek pulls Spencer close and listens to the whimpering that comes with his tears. "You know we love you, Pretty boy. You'll always be one of us. You'll always be our family Spencer. Don't you know that? Don't you know how amazing you are?"

* * *

Aaron gets into Jessica's car after she bails him out. "You beat him? In front of Jack?" She asks coldly. "I don't know what came over me. It's not going to happen again." She drops him off at his house. He's not surprised that Jack and Spencer are gone.

He drives to work and knocks on Erin's door. "Agent Hotchner, how nice of you to show up," she says with malice. He takes a seat in front of her desk. "I had to give temporary control of the team to Agent Morgan in your absence," she tells him.

"He is the best choice for the job. Agent Morgan is one of the best agents I've ever worked with." Strauss fiddles with the papers on her desk. "I also fired Spencer Reid," she tells him.

This surprises him. "You're punishing him for... Having a relationship within his team?" He questions. She nods. "Shouldn't I be the one getting fired? I was his commanding officer. He should have probation, at most." Erin bites her lip determinedly.

"We need you more than we need him. He is inexperienced. You could easily get the same help he provided with access to Google. I made the choice that I felt was best for the entire team."

Aaron disagrees."This isn't up for debate. What I called you in for was to discuss your place on the team. Would you feel comfortable being in the same team? Either leading or not?" Aaron doesn't know. He has no doubt that they all know what happened. He has no doubt that they all hate him.

"I am going to give Agent Morgan the choice of remaining the lead or not. Your place will be determined by his, unless you wish to be transferred." Aaron shakes his head. He's not a blinker. "That is fine. I trust you'll let me know as soon as Morgan makes his decision."

* * *

Derek is called into Strauss' office. "I just had a meeting with Agent Hotchner," she tells him. His blood begins to boil. "He does not wish to transfer to another team. However, I am not just going to make him lead. If you wish to remain in charge of the BAU you may do so. In that case Hotchner will take your old position. If you choose to go back, Agent Hotchner will take your current position."

Derek grinds his teeth. Did Hotch have no shame? "Why isn't he being fired, like Reid?" He questions. "We can replace Reid. Agent Hotchner has years of experience." Derek just shakes his head. "I would prefer to remain lead."

Strauss smiles. "And so it shall be. Agent Hotchner should be in the building. Please let him know what you've decided. And have a nice day," she tells him.

He closes her door and tries to mentally calm himself for a discussion with the prick that had abused his Spencer.


	9. Spencer's Phone

Derek grinds his teeth the entire ride home. He hated Hotch. He hated Hotch more than he hated Buford. He gets home and sees Spencer and Jack making dinner together. He walks into the kitchen with a smile. "Whatever that is, it smells delicious," Derek tells them. The soup they were making looked like a science experiment gone wrong.

"It's a recipe passed down from my mother," Spencer tells him. He wraps his arms around Spencer in a tight hug. "I'm really happy to see you," he tells him. Spencer frowns. "Did something happen today?"

Derek nods and leans his head on Spencer's shoulder. "I was made permanent head of the BAU. However, Hotch made bail and he's now taking my old position," he tells him. Jack gasps. "Daddy is out? WHat if he comes back to hurt Spencer again?" Spencer grabs the boy. "He won't. Your daddy knows better," Spencer tries to soothe.

Derek pets the boy. "I talked to him. He's going to stay away from you two for a whle. He has to go to a special doctor that will make him less angry. When he's done, then he can talk to you." Spencer is surprised. He'd promised to go, but he didn't think he would. "Is it mandatory?" He questions. Derek shakes his head. "He wants to be able to see you. He wants to know what is wrong with him, because he loves you and doesn't want to hurt you."

Spencer bites his lip. "I miss him," he admits. Derek sighs. "So do I, pretty boy."

* * *

Hotch sits in his house and combats the voice in his head that tells him to drink. According to his anger management program he was not allowed to drink. He misses his lover and his son. He would love nothing more than to make dinner for his family, watch a movie together, tuck his son in and make love to his lover before falling asleep with the younger man in his arms.

He pulls out his phone and calls Spencer. After the third ring he answers. "Reid," he answers in a business tone, though he'd been fired. "Spencer, it's Aaron," Hotch tells him. "If you don't want ot talk, you can hang up.I just miss you..." Hotch tells him. "I... I'm still here," Spencer says. "How have you been? And how's Jack?" He can hear Spencer biting his lip.

"We're alright. Jack has been a little closed-up, but it's nothing I didn't expect after what he went through." Aaron feels the guilt run deep. "I am so sorry Spencer. I can't believe I did those things to you. I started anger management, just like I said," he tells Spencer.

"I heard. They fired me," Spencer responds. "I heard. I uhm... Do you mind keeping Jack? At least until after I finish my therapy?" Aaron asks. "He's my son too. Of course I don't mind having him. I hope you don't expect me to just give him back. I will fight you to every courtroom that lets us in!" Spencer shouts. Aaron winces.

"No, no. I won't. I want to be able to see him Spencer... But after what you went through, and I know you did it to stay with him, I could never take him from you. I just want to be able to see him. And I don't want you to feel like he's a burden."

Spencer has an intense wish to touch the man he used to sleep with every night. "Maybe... If you finish anger management... You can see him. Us. You can see us," he says. "Spencer, I would love to see you. But, could you ever forgive me enough to love me again?" He asks. He feels near tears. "I never stopped loving you, Aaron. I just know better.I don't want to be abused. If I hadn't tried to leave- If I hadn't gotten help, you would have ended up killing me. Whether you meant to or not."

"I'm changing. I promise I am. When I finish, is there a chance?' Aaron pleads. Spencer wipes his eyes. Derek has noticed his face and wraps his arms around him before taking the phone. Spencer is crying into his shirt. "Tell him... Tell him I will just have to see.I have to know he's changed,"Spencer whimpers. "Did you get that?" Derek asks with a level voice. "Yes... I'm sorry," He tells Derek. He hangs the phone up and holds the sobbing man.

* * *

He tries to maintain a professional demeanor. Hotch is at his door first thing in the morning. "I just wanted to make sure that this isn't going to be too hard for you. If you don't think you'll be able to have me on the team, whether it's simply because you hate me or otherwise, just let me know. I have no problem switching teams. You don't deserve to be stuck with me."

Derek sighs. "I am upset with you on an unprofessional level. Professionally- I know you can do your job better than anyone else. I want you here for the good of the people that need us. But if you abuse my kindness, or if you go after my best friend again I won't be so nice."

Derek had wanted to tell him to just go. They didn't need him- but he could tell Hotch was trying. This had been a humbling experience for the older man. He wasn't a blinker, so to have him be the one to apologize first, when it wasn't professionally needed meant that he letting go of that ego and dominance and trying to be human. Derek guessed that was about all they could ask for at this point.


	10. Aaron's Luck

Spencer walks his son to school. Derek offers to drive them every morning, but it was just something the duo preferred to do. "If daddy stops being angry, are we going to be a family again?" The boy asks.

Spencer smiles. "I don't know Jack. Daddy would have to change a lot, because I don't want any bad people around you." Jack squeezes his hand. "I love you," he says softly. The little boy smiles brightly at him."I love you too!"

* * *

He gets home and starts cleaning. It didn't take very long before he was done. He started reading, but it only kept him occupied for a few hours. He'd read every book in the house. Re-read some of them.

He sighs and lays on the couch. He closes his eyes and thinks about Hotch. How Hotch used to suck him off when they didn't have a lot of time. Despite the teasing from the team, Spencer enjoyed sex very much. He grips himself and thinks of how Hotch used to blow him.

He fists himself rough- it's been a long time since he'd had any sort of pleasurable release. It doesn't take very long and he's over the edge. His hand feels sticky and suddenly he feels embarrassed. Here he is, alone and unemployed masturbating on his best friends couch, in the middle of that day, to past memories with his abusive ex.

He needed a drink. First a shower, but definitely a drink after.

* * *

He naps until it is time to pick Jack up. He grabs his bag and his phone and begins to walk to the school. Halfway there his phone starts ringing. "Spencer, it's Aaron. I'm taking a lunch break right now. Can I come get you to pick up Jack? We can get ice cream and then I'll drop you both off at Morgan's house."

Spencer bites his lip. "I'll meet you at the school, but I swear to everything, Aaron. Don't mess this up."

Aaron is waiting outside his son's classroom when Spencer arrives. "Hello Spencer," Aaron says. Spencer waves, suddenly feeling shy. Aaron stops closer to him and stands beside him, but doesn't touch him. "You look good." He tells Spencer. "Don't, Aaron," Spencer says.

Aaron raises an eyebrow. "You look healthy. You look much better without me around hurting you," he tells him honestly. "It's in the past. It will never happen again," Spencer says.

"I've really missed you," he says. Spencer smiles a little. "I've missed you too." Aaron tucks stray pieces of hair behind Spencer's ear. "I love you," he tells him, looking right into his eyes. Spencer uses all of his will power not to lean forward and kiss the man in front of him.

"I love you too, Aaron. But we can't do this. Not yet." Aaron nods his agreement. There was still a long road in front of him. He honestly did love Spencer. He had never wanted to hurt him. The pain he felt from not being able to see his lover and his son whenever were nothing compared to the pain he put them through with his rage. Hopefully he could get better and then show them that he could be a good person and they would accept him back.

They both watch as children come running from the classroom. Jack is one of the last to emerge. He looks around for Spencer and sees them together. His eyes grow wide and he steps over hesitantly. "Is daddy okay to be around?" Jack asks, wondering if he should go get his teacher for help.

"Yes. Daddy wants to take us out for ice cream to talk for a few minutes. Is that okay?" Spencer asks. Jack studies his father and then slowly nods. "No funny stuff," he says to his father.

hThey get into Aaron's car and he asks where they want to go. "Cold stone!" The boy yells. "They put gummy bears in the ice cream," he explains. When they all have their ice cream they sit at a table outside.

"How has everything been, buddy?" Aaron asks. Jack takes a big bite of ice cream. "Papa is depressed and we both miss you, but we can't be a family again unless you stop being bad." Aaron is heartbroken. "I'm sorry, Jack. I'm working really hard so that I can be there for you more. Are you okay with staying with papa?" The boy nods happily. "We protect each other."

Aaron knows that that is a trait of living in an abusive household. The parents protect the children in most normal cases. With abuse, parents and child protect one another from the abuser. Arron is mad at himself for ever putting his son in this situation.

* * *

They finish their ice cream and Aaron drives them home. Jack gets out and goes up to the front door. "Can I have a good bye kiss?" Aaron asks. Spencer blushes and leans towards him. Aaron lips meet his softly. "Until next time," Aaron says softly. Spencer smiles faintly and gets out of the car. Aaron drives away feeling good.

Spencer unlocks the door with a smile and Jack runs into the house. He turns to follow the boy and is struck in the head. The whole world goes black.

* * *

Derek gets home and is surprised when the door is unlocked. Because of their jobs, they were a bit over protective. They never left the door open. He walks in and takes in the scene. Jack's backpack is on the ground. The contents are spread across the floor. There's blood a few feet from the backpack.

He calls his team first and then the police. He walks through the house with his gun drawn. "Spencer and Jack are missing," he tells Garcia. "We need to tell Hotch," she says. Derek sighs and dials his number. "Hotchner," he answers. "Hotch, it's Morgan. Look, we have a problem." Hotch gets in his car and begins to drive toward the BAU.

"Do we have a case?" He asks. "Spencer and Jack are missing. It looks liek someone got into the house. There's blood on the floor and Jack's stuff is everywhere."

Aaron is stunned. "Missing?" He asks. "Man, I need you to be able to stay objective or this can't work. I'll take you off the case." Aaron takes a moment to breath. "I want to stay on the case. I'm heading to the BAU right now."

* * *

"When Hotch makes it to the BAU the team is already there. The moment he walks in they all stare. "What's wrong?" He asks. Derek walks up looking like he's going to punch the older man.

"We tracked Spencer's records. Seems he was out today after getting Jack. He went to get ice cream with you right before he went missing. Care to elaborate?"

Aaron is taken aback. "Are you accusing me of this, Morgan?" He growls. "If the shoe fits, man." Morgan responds. Emily gets between them. "Hotch, that is you with him on tape, isn't it?" She asks. He nods.

"I asked if I could go with him to get Jack today. We got ice cream and talked about what-ifs. I dropped them off at Morgan's house and I came back to work."

"Maybe the what-ifs didn't work in your favor, so you decided to just take what you wanted instead of getting permission. It wouldn't be the first time," Derek spits. Aaron glares. "The talk went well. He even gave me a kiss before I drove away. Then he and Jack went inside and I left. I wouldn't hurt them."

Derek shakes his head and grabs Hotch's arm. "For now , you're suspect number one." Aaron is pushed against a wall and handcuffed while Morgan tells him his rights. He doesn't fight at all while he is walked to the cells. Morgan has the courtesy to place him in one by himself, given that many prisoners know who he is.

"Morgan, I didn't do it," Hotch says. Morgan stares at him before sighing. "Look, Hotch. In all honesty, I believe you. I think you'v been working hard and I know you love them. It's just that I need to cover all the bases. Please understand."


	11. Jack's Guidance

Spencer wakes to darkness. He's on his knees with his arms chained above him. There is a collar around his neck that is attached to the wall. "Jack," he calls out softly. He hears a quiet whimper. "Jack, buddy. It's papa. Can you say something? Are you alright?"

He doesn't breath while he listens for the boy. "I'm alright papa. It's really dark and I'm scared," he says. "What's the last thing you remember?" He asks the boy. "I runned in the house and there was a man standing there and he hit you in the head and I started crying and he put a rag on my face and I went to sleep."

Spencer frowns. He'd drugged Jack. "Are you chained up?" Spencer asks. "No," the boy answers. He'd probably been too small to put in the cuffs. "Can you come here? Follow the sound of my voice. I want to see you and make sure you're alright," Spencer explains until he feels his son grab his shoulder.

Jack hugs his papa and sits beside him. "How long do we have to stay down here?" Jack asks. "I don't know buddy. But Daddy and Derek and everyone else will be looking for us. So, if the man comes back, stay away from him. I won't let him hurt you."

They're in the dark for a long time. His son falls asleep on him and his stomach begins to ache from hunger. He knows that if he is feeling it, Jack will be also. He sighs and leans his head back. his arms are starting to ache also.

He hears footsteps and sits back up. A door opens, but it's still dark. "Are you awake yet?" A soft but deep voice asks. "Who are you?" Spencer asks. "Ah, Spencer. It's so good to hear your voice again. I trust you've been well since we last met?" Spencer tries to go through his brain for a match to that voice. He can almost feel it on the tip of his tongue.

"Who are you?" He asks again. "I know you'll figure it out soon enough. We can turn this into a game. You get to guess, and if you're wrong I get to hurt you. What do you want if you guess correctly?" Spencer frowns. He's a sadist. "I want to be able to leave with my son." The mystery man 'tsks'. "I'm not just going to let you go, Spencer. Pick something else."

"I want you to let my son go. Call his other father and meet him somewhere to release him. Or let me watch while you let him go." It's quiet for a moment. "I guess that's acceptable. I only grabbed him because he saw me. I was very surprised, Spencer. I didn't know you had any children."

This wasn't someone he'd been around recently. This was someone from the distant past. "Okay, time for you to make your first guess!" The man says. Spencer licks his lips. "I don't have a guess yet."

"Well, you can forfeit your turn then, and I'll just go straight to the painful part and you'll have missed the chance to narrow down your list." Whoever this was, he was very smart.

"Is it someone I worked with at the BAU?" Spencer asks. He feels a heavy hit to his face and his body doesn't have time to prepare. "You get to guess one name. Stop trying to bend the rules, Spencer." Spencer licks his lips again. "Is... Is it... Professor Black?" Spencer asks. He feels another hit to his face. "Incorrect. My turn," the man says. He alternates which side of Spencer's face he hits. When Spencer is hanging almost limp the man holds his face and blindfolds him.

Spencer can feel Jack struggling. "Papa, help!" He yells. Spencer begins to fight. "Leave him alone!" He snarls. He hears the man hit his son before he himself is hit. "Tell him to stop wiggling while I blindfold him, or I'll hurt him just as bad as I did you," the man says. Spencer spits out blood. "Jack, hold still, okay? He's not going to hurt you..." Spencer says, trying to sound sure.

The boy is crying but stops struggling. He hears the man stomp off but doesn't hear the door shut. Soon he returns and drops something before flicking a light on and walking away. "When I leave, the kid can take the blindfold off, but you may not. I've left food for you, so you'll have to have him feed you."

The door slams shut and Jack scrambles to take his blindfold off. "He left us food, papa!" The boy says. He immediately holds something up to Spencer's mouth. "Does it look safe? Like good food?" Spencer asks. "Yes," the boy answers. "Okay, I want you to eat until you're full, and then I will eat some too, okay? But make sure you get full."

He listens to the boy eat and prays that it's not bad. Soon the boy taps his papa. "I'm full now. Can you eat?" Spencer nods and slowly begins to eat with his son feeds him.

* * *

Morgan and the team sit in the meeting room. "I don't know where else to look. Hotch is the first person that comes to mind, but I really don't think he did this," Morgan says. "Why are you so quick to rule him out?" JJ asks.

"I just don't think he would have worked so hard to change and win them back if this was his plan. And he's not stupid. Why would he be with them so publicly and then pull this?" Emily agrees. "We need to make a list of everyone that hates Pretty boy. Anyone have any names?"

"Tobias Hankle and Phillip Dowd didn't have any family, so we're ruling them out. Spencer never mentioned fighting with anyone. Have we had any unsubs threaten him specifically?" Garcia looks uneasy. "Hotch might know..."

Derek sighs. "I'll go work with Hotch. You guys keep looking for other suspects."


	12. Derek's Gamble

Derek is sitting across from Hotch. "Has Spencer been threatened at all recently? Has anyone said anything to either of you? And jealous exes?" Hotch shakes his head. "All my neighbors loved him. The only person that's said or done anything to hurt him was me. I wouldn't have allowed anyone to hurt him, Morgan. I have no idea who could have taken him."

* * *

Spencer's arms have gone numb. They'd hurt for a long time before he just stopped feeling them. Jack is sitting beside him and drifting in and out of sleep. He hears footsteps again and tries to sit up as much as he can.

The door opens and he tries to look toward the sound. He flips the light off and tells the child to put his blindfold back on. Jack wiggles next to him and then says when it's back on. "Child, come toward my voice," the man says. Jack stands and Spencer fights his enclosure. "Don't hurt him," he says. "Please, just leave him alone. He's just a baby," Spencer begs.

"I'm not going to hurt him. He hasn't done anything to me. I just need him to step aside for what I'm about to do," the man says. He feels hands run up his back and he shakes. His arms are released and fall. He falls on his back and tries to curl up.

"When did you decide you were gay?" The man asks. Spencer is still trying to make his limbs function. "I came out when I was in high school, but I've always known." Spencer answers. He'd been open about his sexuality in college and at work, so this must be someone from before then. Someone that had a vendetta from when they were children together?

"Are you ready to make your next guess?" Spencer takes a deep breath. "Is it Ethan?" He feels a hand run down his face. That same hand slaps him hard. "Incorrect." Spencer tenses his body for the kicking that covers his whole body. He feels each and every one. Breathing gets harder to do.

He hears the man walk away again and throw something in the room. "The same rules as last time apply," he says before turning the light back on and slamming the door. He hadn't chained Spencer back up.

Jack brings the bag over near Spencer. "Papa... Are you okay?" The boy asks. Spencer tries to nod. "I'm alright Jack. Is there more food?" The boy goes through the bag. "There's food and water and candy and some toys and some bandaids." Spencer doesn't know that he can move.

"Papa, lift your head up," the boy says. He lifts his head and the boy slides something soft under it. Spencer lays his head back down and falls asleep.

As soon as he wakes he panics. "Jack! Are you okay?" He yells. "Papa, I'm fine. Are you hungry yet?" He asks calmly. "What are you doing?" He asks the boy. "He gave me a coloring book and some crayons, so I was coloring. I saved you some food papa." Spencer struggles to sit up and leans against the wall.

Jack feeds him, as his arms are still weak. "Jack, I love you," Spencer tells his son. He feels his son hug him. "Love you too papa. Are you alright?" Spencer nods. "Do you want me to bandage your head?" The boy asks. "Am I bleeding?" He asks. When had he hit his head? "A little," the boy answers. He has Jack wrap his head and they cuddle together to sleep.

* * *

Derek lays his head on his desk. It's been forty-seven hours since Spencer and Jack had gone missing. Normally, this would be where they would start losing hope, but he knew Spencer was still alive. He had to be.

Could it have been someone Spencer didn't know? That was very unlikely. Morgan sits up and sees Garcia at his door. "All the blood belonged to Spencer. They also found chloroform. They think it was used to get Jack, since there isn't any of his blood at the scene," she tells him. Derek nods. "They also lifted some prints that don't belong to Spencer, Jack, Hotch or you. They're running them right now."

Morgan sighs and invites her in. "Do you want ot get a milkshake with me?" Derek asks. Garcia nods. She knows how hard this must be for Derek. "I'm releasing Hotch. There's no reason to keep him. He didn't do it," he tells her. "We can take him with us," she says. He agrees and they walk out of his office.

* * *

Hotch is sitting in his cell when he sees Morgan and Garcia walk up to him. "You're being released," Morgan says. "Did you find them?" Hotch asks. He's standing near where Morgan is. "Not yet, but they found some finger prints that don't belong to any of us. You'll be of more help to us out than in. But if you skip town, we'll find you and that will be all the evidence we nee," he tells Hotch.

With his new freedom he goes with Morgan and Garcia to get some food. They bring Hotch up to date on the case. "Was it enough blood to be concerned?" Hotch asks softly. Garcia and Morgan shake their heads. "Mild head trauma. Probably what knocked him out." Hotch sighs. "What about old friends or relatives. Anyone recently get in contact with him?"

"The only old friend I know about is Ethan, and they usually talk every few months. He hasn't mentioned him more than normal, though. And Ethan hasn't said anything to me. As far as family goes, there's his mom and dad. He didn't have any siblings and his parents were both single children. His grandparents are all dead."


	13. Spencer's Abductor

Spencer wakes up to Jack shaking him. "Papa, wake up. I'm lonely," he says. "I'm awake. Do you want me to tell you a story?" The boy nods and cuddles into his chest. He wraps his arms around the boy and begins to tell him a story.

When they had been silent for a while Spencer kisses the boy's forehead. "What does the man look like?" He asks. "He's tall," Jack says. He kisses his son again. They eat more before he hears the footsteps. "Put the blindfold on, boy," the man says. Jack hurries to put it on.

"Why are you hurting my papa?" He asks sadly. "Because I have a right to." The man answers. He takes him by the hand and leads him across the room. He comes back to Spencer. "Get on your knees and turn around," the man says. Once Spence is in position he is cuffed again. His arms are so far above him that it keeps him completely erect.

"Who am I? He asks. Spencer shudders. "Are you a bully from high school?" The man chuckles. "I'll let that slide since there were so many of them. However, that is incorrect." Spencer wants to cry. Suddenly he feels a sharp sting. "Count them! Out loud!"

"One!" Spencer cries. He gets to ten before the man tells him to start again. Spence is crying. The whip is digging deep into his flesh. "Ten!" He yells again. "Again, Spencer." The man says. "Please, daddy," Spencer sobs. The man doesn't move and Spencer gasps. "Dad?" He asks.

The man grins. "So, you finally got it. You know, for a profiler, you didn't really put those clues together." Spencer can't get his mind to settle. This was his father? "Why are you doing this to me?"

The whip hits him again. "You ruined my life Spencer! You messed your mother up, you messed yourself up." Spencer is whipped again. "We were just fine until she had you. And of course you couldn't come out right. You couldn't have one normal thing about you." Another hit.

"I'm sorry. I... I'm sorry," Spencer says. "Your mom only got sick after you were born," another hit. "You did that to her. And then you didn't get it. She was so worried that you would get it too." Another hit. "She worried herself near death, Spencer. And for what? For a son that has everything wrong with him but his mental capacities?" He yells before hitting Spencer over and over until he'd calmed.

"Have your son bandage you. I'll give you some time together before I send him home," the man says. He walks out but doesn't throw anything inside. Jack runs over and Spencer can hear his crying.

"Jack, sweetheart. I know this is scary, but papa is hurt. Can you take those band aids and some water and clean papa's back?" Jack sniffles and begins to pat his abused back with a wet piece of cloth. Spencer hisses but doesn't move. He doesn't want to scare Jack any more than he already must be.

Once his son bandages him he tells the boy to eat what's left of their food. Was his father going to kill him? Would he safely deliver Jack to Aaron? "Jack, listen. He's going to let you go. I need you to find daddy. I need you to tell him that I'm with my dad, okay?" "I will papa," the boy says. He hugs Spencer carefully before sitting next to him to sleep.

William Reid returns to the room. "Spencer, wake up," he says. Spencer's already awake though. "Are you going to let him go now?" He asks. "The hope in your voice is amusing. Of course I'm not. Do you think I'm stupid?" He's kicked in the back. "He would go to his other father. How long do you think it would be before he led them back?"

Spencer begins to cry. "Please, dad. He's my son and I would do anything for him. Just let him go. you can kill me, or whatever it is that you want." William pets Spencer's head. "I just want you to feel the pain I've had to live with. You ruined everything, Spencer. I wish you had never been born but there's nothing I can do now. Nothing I can do but get even."

He kicks Spencer again and he wheezes. "She still wanted you, even after we found out you were messed up. She put you over me. She put you over herself." Spencer grits his teeth. "I didn't ask to be born," Spencer tells him. "Well I didn't ask either!" His father yells. Spencer hangs almost limp. "Just kill me and get it over with," he tells his father. "I don't plan on killing you myself. I'm dying, Spencer. Cancer in my lungs. I'm going to keep you here until I die. If you aren't found after that, you'll starve to death. If you are found, then you won't."

Spencer's stomach aches with dread. "And my son?" He asks. "He's the icing on the cake. He's a little boy. He'll die before you do." Spencer hangs his head. "Aw, cheer up son. Once he's dead you can eat his body and prolong your own survival."

* * *

Aaron sits with the team. "What if it is his father? He hasn't said much about him, but it was all negative." JJ sighs. "Garcia, run a check and see where William Reid is these days," Morgan says. His goddess types away quickly. "Anyone else?" Emily asks. "There's still Ethan," JJ says. "Look for Ethan too," Morgan adds.

"Anything for you, my chocolate boss-man." She frowns while she's typing. "Guys," she says, interrupting their conversation. "William Reid just bought a house near Spencer's. Just as in within the last month. He hasn't been in touch with Spencer? It says his firm is still in Las Vegas."

They all stand to go to William Reid's new house. "Baby girl, send us those coordinates." She types more and winks at him. His phone vibrates the moment she does so and he jets out.

They reach William Reid's house and the man answers. He looks ill. "Mr. Reid, we are looking for your son. He's gone missing with his step-son. Have you seen him?" Morgan asks. "I came here to try and work on our relationship, but I haven't had the time to talk to him yet. I'm dying," he tells them. Derek checks his phone. He's waiting for Garcia to send him a search warrant.

"Can we come in and check?" Aaron asks. "Do you have a warrant? If not, please get off my lawn. I need my rest," the man states. Aaron narrows a glare. "If you're innocent you have no reason to turn us away." The man smiles back smugly. "I'm an innocent man that enjoys his rights. Good day, agents."

They get back into the cars and drive down the street. They need that damn search warrant.


	14. Aaron's Son

Garcia is sitting in the judge's chambers. "You can't honestly expect me to grant a search warrant based on a dying man's wish to see his son again, right?" She asks. Garcia bites her lip. "Listen, this is the only lead we really have right now. It's very likely that Spencer and Jack are in his house right now, and we don't even know if they're still alive or not. And if they aren't, then no harm done."

The judge sets her glare on Garcia. "He's a citizen with rights. your "no harm done" is a giant lawsuit that could put us both out of a job. I absolutely refuse. Get some some DNA, get a confession, get fingerprints, get anything that directly ties William Reid to the disappearance and you have it. Until then I can't help you."

Garcia stands. "Your honor, I'm not trying to black mail you, but you owe me one." The judge stands also. "I do owe you one Garcia. If you decide to move, you call me and I'll be right beside you packing boxes and hauling. If you need some money, call me and I will help you out. But I will not go against my rights and my honor as a judge and do this."

Garcia walks out of her office with tears in her eyes. She sends Derek a text, not trusting herself to call. "No warrant. Need more evidence."

* * *

Derek punches the side of his car. "There's not enough evidence to get a warrant," he tells them. "We can stake out," Hotch says. "We can stay across the street or something and wait for him to take the garbage out. We can dust for fingerprints and see if we can find Jack's or Reid's, or make a connection to the one at the house."

The girls and Rossi go back to the station and Derek and Hotch remain near the house. It's last at night when they spot William Reid taking a single back of garbage out to the curb. He looks around and heads back in the house. Hotch gets out of the car and grabs the bag and quickly sits bakc down and they drive away.

He opens the bag and finds only a note. "You're not that sneaky, agents," it reads. Hotch growls and throws the bag down.

* * *

Spencer is sore and hungry. His stomach had gone from being extremely painful to being a constant dull ache. What hurts the most is that his son is going through the same thing.

"Jack, buddy. Are you alright?" He asks his son. "I'm hungry papa. Is daddy going to find us?" He asks. Spencer wants to cry. "He is, baby. He's going to find us and he's going to save us because he loves us." Jack lays his head on Spencer's legs and sniffles. It hurts Spencer to hear this.

"I'm really sorry Jack. I'm so sorry for all of this," Spencer says. "I love you so much. I would do anything to get you out of here." Jack snuggles close. "I know papa. I love you too."

Spencer lets himself cry quietly when he knows his child is sleeping. It had been days since they'd eaten. They would die soon, and it would be terrible and painful. He hardly had the water to spare for tears. He hears foot steps and he calls for help. The footsteps stop but Spencer can't say anything else. He's just sobbing. The door opens and he prays for the first time in his life.

"What do you want, Spencer?" His father asks. "Please, please just let him go. Just, put him anywhere. He doesn't know who you are and he doesn't know where this is. Please father," he begs.

William Reid sighs. Spencer was right in the fact that his son hadn't done anything to him. It wasn't his grandson's fault that Spencer had ruined everything. "Also," he says. "This is the one thing I will do for you, Spencer. This is the one thing I will do to make up for all the things I didn't when you were a kid. And you'll stay here and you'll starve to death and that will be how you repent for ruining your me and your mother."

Spencer hurriedly agrees. He feels his father lift his son up. "I love you Jack," he cries. "Bye papa," the boy says sadly.

* * *

William Reid puts the boy in the car and drives him out and into the next city. "Son, do you know what my name is?" Jack shakes his head. "Do you know where we just were?" Jack rubs his tummy. "Your house?" Jack asks. William feels confident that those aren't enough details. "Do you want me to kill you, Jack?" Jack begins to cry and shakes his head.

"Please let my papa out. I love him," Jack asks. William shakes his head. "I'm going to let you go and you can stay alive. But if anyone asks, you don't tell them anything about me, okay?" He stops outside of a bar and tells the boy to get out before speeding away.

Jack wanders into the bar and is stopped by a bouncer. "Hey buddy, it's really late at night for you to be walking around. And you're not old enough to be in here. Do you know where your parents are?"

Jack takes a deep breath. "My papa and I were kidnapped and I need to find my daddy to tell him that my papa is with his dad," jack explains. His stomach growls and the bouncer is frightened. He lifts the child and takes him to the back.

The bartender brings the boy some soup and looks him over for injuries with the bouncer phones the police. "Do you know your daddy's name?" The man asks Jack. "His name is SSA Aaron Hotchner with the FBI," the boy answers before taking a long drink of water.

Within ten minutes the bar was filled with FBI and police. A large man with a no-nonsense face runs in and scoops the boy up. "Daddy!" The boy squeals. "Oh God, Jack. Are you okay?" Jack nods a little wearily. "He wouldn't feed us, daddy. He said we would have to eat each other, but papa got him to let me go. He even let his hurt him so that he wouldn't hurt me," he explains.

Aaron is about to cry. How could he have ever hurt the man that would sacrifice himself for their son. "Do you know who has daddy?' Morgan asks. "He said to tell you that it's his father. He made papa guess who it was and he finally got it."

Morgan runs out with a phone to call Garcia for the search warrant.


	15. William's Rest

Jack is sitting with his father at the BAU. "Honey, when did you last eat?" JJ asks. Garcia has brought in homemade chicken soup for him. "He let us eat the first two times he came in, but then he stopped feeding us. Papa didn't eat very much," he tells them sadly. By their unsure recollection the boy had been starved for almost five days.

Morgan rushes into the conference room. "We got it, Let's go. JJ, can you stay here with Jack?" He asks while they gear up. JJ takes Jack's hand and nods. Garcia sits with them.

* * *

They pile in the SUV and call for emergency crews and back up. Morgan speeds his way to William Reid's house. When they get there he knocks once before kicking the door in. Inside they find William Reid in bed. He's been dead for at least a day. They spread out and check rooms, but Spencer is nowhere to be found. There isn't even a basement to this house.

Morgan punches a wall and watches Emergency crews take the corpse out. Hotch grabs Morgan's arm. "Check the floors. Spencer told me once that when he was a kid his father would hide them in his room under the floor when his mother would start to get out of control." The team splits up until they hear Emily call out. "I found it guys! Hallway closet!"

They all rush in and follow Emily down. There are two rooms. Hotch and Morgan each take a door and throw it open. Morgan and Emily look around the empty room. Hotch and Rossi burst in and they spot Spencer's body. His arms are suspended above him but his body is completely lifeless. His arms are swollen and miscolored.

Hotch rushes over and lifts the boy's face to look him over. Rossi grabs his wrist carefully to look for a pulse. "Hotch, I can't tell if he's still alive or not. We have to get him down."

Morgan comes into the room and gasps. "Is he alive?" He asks. "We don't know yet. Help up get him out of these," Hotch says. Derek Morgan uses a crowbar to separate the restraints from the wall. Cuff still hung from his arms, but they posed no risk.

The lay his body flat and Rossi puts an ear to his chest. "He's still alive, but we have to hurry." The carry his body up and EMT's take him. "Hotch, go wth him," Morgan says. Hotch shoots him a thankful look and follows him into the ambulance.

* * *

He has to wait in the lobby. He had informed him that he and Spencer were married and thus he was family. They had been hesitant at first. He'd been here earlier with Jack and didn't want to bring him back, but JJ has been texting him for the last hour telling him that Jack needs him and Jack needs to see how Spencer is doing.

Morgan has sat beside him for the last two hours. They hadn't spoke at all. Hotch clears his throat. "Thank you for letting me go with him." Derek Morgan nods. "There's not much you can do at this point, but I know you'll feel a little better if you're at least here. He will, too."

Hotch leans back. JJ was bringing JJ in a few minutes and he wanted to compose his self.

* * *

Five hours later he's holding a sleeping Jack when a doctor comes out. "Agent Hotchner, may I speak with you?" Morgan offers to take Jack and Aaron follows the doctor. "Your husband was in deplorable condition. We're doctors, we don't work miracles," he tells him. Hotch nods.

"He's alive, but he's not ever going to be the same. He's been beaten and whipped, starved at the least of it. His arms were suspended long enough to lose circulation. One of them had to be amputated below the elbow. The other is in tact, but if the infection comes back we may have to cut that one off too," the doctor tells him.

Aaron doesn't know what to do. They'd cut one of Spencer's arms off? "Is he going to live?" He finally asks. "He should. So far we think we can get the infection dealt with. His back will heal. His body will heal, eventually."

Aaron walks back into the waiting room in a daze. They couldn't see him until tomorrow morning, just in case the infection got worse and they needed to do more surgery. "How is he?" Morgan asks.

Hotch feels tears on his face. "They had to amputate one of his arms. They're unsure if he will be able to keep the other. He was beaten, starved and whipped. Some of his injuries were infected."

Everyone is quiet. No one knows what to say. "They think he will live. We can see him tomorrow, if they don't have to do any other surgery on him tonight. He doesn't know about his arm, yet. He's not woke the entire time."

Morgan stands and after passing Jack to Garcia embraces Hotch. Hotch allows himself to cry. "The arm he gets to keep is the one I almost broke when he went out with you," he tells Morgan. He can hear the guilt coming from his voice.

* * *

Morning comes and Morgan and Hotch still remain. Garcia has taken Jack home with her with the promise of returning in the morning. The doctor comes out and shakes Aaron awake. "Agent Hotchner, you can see your husband now. You can take your friend also, if you would like. He remian constant through the night, so we're fairly certain he will keep the other arm."

Morgan and Hotch follow the doctor to Spencer's room. The boy is small and discolored. There is a small, white nub where his arm should be. "Will he wake up soon?" Morgan asks. "We estimate sometime within the next few hours." Morgan and Hotch sit in the chairs near the bed and wait.


	16. Spencer's Arm

Reid wakes in a weird sort of daze. Had they given him narcotics? He blinks but his eyes and his mouth feel like they're full of cotton. He feels a hand on his face petting him soft. He reaches his arm up to touch the hand but can't seem to make his limbs function.

"Spencer, don't move your arm so much," Hotch tells him. He wasn't dead. Hotch was here. Spencer's brain tries to cement those thoughts, but there is pain creeping into his from the arm that wouldn't move right.

"Jack?" Spencer asks. He steels his self for the worst possible news. "Safe with Garcia, Pretty boy," Morgan says. "Drugs?" He asks. "It was absolutely necessary. I'm sorry. I wouldn't have let them if they hadn't needed to," Aaron tells him. "But I will be there to make sure you don't get stuck. Morgan will, too," he says.

Spencer tries to fight off the pain and whimpers. "Dad?" He asks. "He died, pretty boy. When we found him he'd already been dead." Spencer lets out a breath and Aaron clicks the machine next to him to administer more morphine to him. Spencer's eyes roll back and his head lulls until he's out again.

* * *

"Hotch, I'm sorry you're having to go through this. I know it's hard on you too. And on poor Jack. It's painful for all of us, but we aren't in the same position. I saw the way you looked at me when you said we'd be here. You don't need to worry, man. We're a family."

Hotch nods sadly. "I can't believe the things I've done to him. If I had never done things like that his father would have never been able to get to him," Hotch says. Morgan snorts. "How do you think I feel? He was in my house when it happened. If I had been safer, or added more locks or something- this wouldn't have happened. But it did, and they're both alive and that's the best we could ask for."

Hotch sighs and nods. "What if he hates me when he wakes up?" Morgan purses his lips. "Then you take the high road. You consider yourself lucky that Jack hasn't lost another parent and that he's at least alive."

Hotch knows he's right. It's just painful to worry about. Of course he didn't want Spencer to hate him. He had never intended for that. Even when he was raping and beating Spencer, he loved him dearly. He'd gotten help. He was still getting help. He would do anything to be a family again. But what if he never got that chance?

* * *

Jack is sitting with Garcia. They are putting together a large puzzle. "What if my papa dies? Do I have to live with my daddy?" Garcia frowns. "Probably buddy. But Papa isn't going to die," she tells him. "Papa said we could live with daddy again when he became a good person. He doesn't want bad people around me. Is my daddy a good person now?"

Garcia doesn't know what to say. "Your daddy is a good person, but Spencer is the only one that can decide how good he needs to be." Jack yawns. "My papa let the bad man do a lot of things to him to save me. Do you think my daddy would do the same thing?" Garcia wipes her eyes. "Of course baby. Your daddy would do anything to protect you."

Jack shakes his head. "I mean for my papa." Garcia stares at the curious child. "I think he would Jack."

* * *

Reid opens his eyes and looks at Hotch. "Aaron?" He asks. Hotch grips his hand. "Hey baby. How are you feeling?" Morgan pushes the nurse call button. "Aaron my arm hurts," Spencer whines. Aaron releases him. "The other arm," he tells him. Morgan and Hotch frown at one another. There was no other arm.

"Spence, look. The doctor is going to check you out and he will tell you how everything is, okay?" Spencer nods and Hotch leans down to kiss him. The doctor comes in hurriedly and greets Spencer.

"Dr. Reid, how are you feeling?" He asks. Spencer shrugs. "I feel like I've been drugged. I'm coming down now, though." The doctor nods. "Spencer when you were brought in, you were in terrible condition. You hadn't eaten in many day- almost a week. Your body was burned and lacerated. The marks on your back will scar. Probably for the rest of your life. The worst part, though, was your arms."

Spencer looks down at his arms and his sight catches on the missing limb. His face shows no emotion but his eyes stay trained on where the arm should be. "We have to amputate your arm because it was starting to rot. You were lacking circulation and you almost lost both of them. We saved this arm, but unfortunately not the other. We're very sorry Dr. Reid."

Spencer puts his arm down and looks up at the ceiling. "Hotch, Morgan. Please leave my room," Spencer asks softly. They don't move and a tear runs down Spencer's face. "I asked you to leave," he tells them. They walk out to allow Spencer to talk to his doctor.

"Is there anything that I can do? I don't want to live anymore," Spencer tells the doctor. The doctor is stunned. "Spencer, are you feeling suicidal?" Spencer continues staring at the ceiling. "I don't want to be alive anymore, please. Or I want more drugs. I don't want this reality anymore," he tells the doctor.

"Dr. Reid, I'm going to start you on a dose of antidepressants. When you're well enough to stay awake for more than a few hours at a time I am going to prescribe therapy. I am very worried about you. You're a very intelligent young man. You can still live a full, active life without that limb. You can get a robotic arm, maybe even be put on a wait list for donor arm."

Spencer doesn't say anything. He'd read many stories of people missing limbs. They still went on to do great things. Very rarely did any of them speak of feeling held back. Science was ever advancing. "What does my husband think? Does he still find me attractive? Will he still desire me? And what about my son? I'm hideous and scary. I will frighten him. Think of all the other people that will be uncomfortable being around me."

The doctor scratches his head. "I've heard stories about you. You're a genius. I would think that you'd be used to people keeping you at arm's length. If your husband didn't love you anymore... Did find you attractive in some way he wouldn't still be trying. I think it would take more than a missing limb to make someone fall out of love. And as for your son. This isn't enough to break that bond. Not even close. Maybe he will be scared at first. Maybe a little grossed out but you will always be his father, no matter what limbs you have or have lost. He will know that eventually if he doesn't now that now."


	17. Aaron's House

When Spencer is released he goes home with Aaron. Aaron helps Spencer into the large master bedroom and tucks him in. He's still on powerful pain medication and won't be off until the next day. Jack sits next to his papa's bed and watches him sleep. "Are we going to live with you now, daddy?" Jack asks. "For a while. At least until papa is better. I hope that he will stay after that, though."

Jack opts to sleep in the bedroom with his papa. Aaron spends the night on the couch. He checks on them through the night and doesn't fall into a deep sleep until four in the morning. He wakes up because Spencer is running fingers through his hair. "You're going to be late for work if you don't wake up now," he tells him with a soft voice.

Aaron sits up and leans forward to kiss Spencer's lips. Spencer moves back and stops Aaron. "We need to talk about what we are now," Spencer says. "We have to reset our boundaries." Aaron sits up and helps Spencer sit on the couch comfortably. "Aaron, we've been through a lot recently. If we are going to continue a romantic relationship I have rules that I will not stand being broken." Aaron pats his knee to ask him to continue.

"I will no longer stand for being abused. This meant with your words or your fists. If I say no to sex, I mean I don't want it. I don't want you to ever hurt Jack. And if you ever rub this in my face, either the fact that my father was the way he is, or that I am missing an arm, I'm leaving. You won't ever find me or Jack."

Aaron is surprised. "I accept those terms. My rules are, I want to be able to spend time with Jack," he tells him. Spencer then allows Aaron to lean forward to kiss him. Spencer kisses back for a few moments before leaning against Aaron's body and falling asleep.

Aaron takes Spencer into his arms and carries him into the bedroom to put him beside their son. He thinks about Spencer's rule and what that means. He would be allowed to stay with his family again as long as he could control his self. He wasn't allowed to hit Spencer or attack him verbally, which was a given. But the part where Spencer said he couldn't taunt him with what happened weighs heavily on his heart. Did Spencer really think he would ever do that?

He gets dressed after a long shower and he sneaks into the bedroom. He kisses Spencer's cheek and wakes him up. "Spencer, I need to bandage you. Can you sit up for me baby?" Spencer quirks an eyebrow and sits up with his back resting on the headboard. Aaron unwraps the layers of bandages. Spencer keeps his eyes closed. Aaron assumes he doesn't want to see the damage. "Are you okay?" Aaron asks. Spencer opens his eyes and blinks. "Huh?"

Aaron smiles. He'd just fallen asleep. He sees Spencer's eyes look over the arm for just a moment before looking away. "Do you want to go out to dinner tonight?" Aaron asks casually as he begins to bandage. Spencer shakes his head. "I know I'm not supposed to upset you, but I think it would be good for you. I think it would be good for us. We can even take Jack and make it a family dinner," Aaron says.

"I wanna go!" Jack mumbles sleepily. They both smile at their son. "I guess we could do a family dinner. You're not embarrassed?" Spencer asks as he looks at his arm. Aaron kisses him long and slow. "Never. There's nothing you could do- Nothing that could happen to you that would embarrass me."

* * *

Jessica comes over to take care of Jack and keep an eye on Spencer. She is running her hand through Spencer's hair when he wakes up. "Hey Spencer. It's Jessica... Jack's aunt, remember?" Spencer sits up slowly. "I'm sorry. Is everything okay?" He asks. She smiles at him. "Of course. I came over to keep an eye on Jack since you're recovering. I just made lunch. I wanted you to come join us."

Spencer smiles a little. "Is Jack alright? I didn't even notice him getting up." She sits down next to him. "He's fine. He's playing... How are you?" Spencer shrugs. "I've been worse." He turns away from her. "You're missing half your arm. It doesn't bother me. I meant being around Aaron." Spencer looks at her. "He's been nice. We set boundaries." "Do you think he's changed?" Spencer shrugs again. "Did he ever do things like this to Haley?"

Jessica shakes her head. "He was always the perfect gentleman. When he was in jail, I didn't believe it. I thought maybe something had gone wrong, but never that Aaron would hit you. But he told me what happened. He admitted it." Spencer wraps his arm around his torso. "Why would he hit me and not her? He loved her," Spencer says. "He's from a long line of 'men don't hit women'. I'm sure there were times that he wanted to. But I think he's changed. I really do."

She helps Spencer get out of bed so he can have lunch with them. Jack smiles at him. "Hi papa! How did you sleep?" Spencer smiles shyly. "I slept just fine. How about you?" Jack nods and takes another bite of his mac and cheese. Jessica puts a plate in front of Spencer and he thanks her. He waits for her to sit before he begins eating. "Papa, I'm sorry about your arm," Jack says sadly. "I know you did it to save me, and I'm sorry." Spencer's eyes tear up. "I love you Jack. It's not your fault."

Jack hugs his papa. "I like it, though. Maybe you could get a robot arm!" He says in a childlike tone. It makes Spencer smile and shake his head. "I'll think about it," he says.

* * *

When Aaron gets home Spencer is asleep again. He wasn't taking narcotic pain medication, but he was still being medicated. Aaron kisses his forehead. "Spencer, do you still want to go out tonight?" He asks. Spencer shakes his head and Aaron's smile falls. "Been sick," Spencer admits. "Can we eat together in the house?" He asks instead. Aaron kisses him again. "Of course. What made you sick?"

Spencer shrugs. "I puked for over an hour. Jessica had to help me shower. I think it might be all the medication. I'm sorry Aaron. Maybe tomorrow we can go out?" He says in an attempt to pacify Aaron. "It's alright Spencer. We can wait until you feel better. I'll call the doctor first thing in the morning and see if there's anything they can do. If you keep puking I'll take you to the hospital, okay?" Spencer nods.

Aaron calls for Chinese food. Jack makes a face and Aaron offers to make him some pizza. Spencer stumbles into the dining room and Aaron grabs him. "Are you okay?" He questions. Spencer nods. "Little dizzy. Can you guide me to the table?" Spencer follows Aaron's pull to sit at the table. He smiles at Aaron and sighs. He's glad to be sitting. Aaron sits Jack down with a slice of pizza before handing Spencer some food.

"How was your day?" Aaron asks. Spencer takes a small bite with a fork. "I slept through most of it. How was work?" Aaron finishes the bite of food he has. "It was alright. Everyone misses you. I told them to give you some time before they bombard you." Spencer nods sleepily. He's looking at Aaron and slowly closes his eyes.

Aaron has to run to catch him before he falls into his food. "Daddy, what's wrong with my papa?" The boy demands. "He's just sleepy," Aaron answers. He's not sure if that's true or not.

He carries Spencer back to bed and tries to wake him. He taps Spencer's cheek and runs his fingers through his hair. Spencer snores a little and Aaron decides to leave him to rest.


End file.
